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to regret or not to regret, that is my question

When I was about twelve years old I began my escapade into the realm of bad choices & mistakes. Everyone's curious around that age.. curious about their bodies, their sexuality.. and I began wondering and wanting to know what all the fuss was over when my mom shielded my eyes during movies when that deep, orcheastrated music played. It was nothing serious.. more words and conversations than actually trying things physically. I lost my virginity when I was fifteen to a long time boyfriend. Before that it was all kissing and basic stuff and after that it was everything. I became reckless and willing.. two very bad combinations. Maybe it's my desire to be wanted and cared for.. i dont know what makes me like this. . but what i do know is that it has gotten me into a whole lot of trouble.. a shitty reputation, people hating me.. a naked picture that spun to 7 different schools.. just about everything that authors write about in those crappy novels found in the teen section of the bookstore has happened to me in four years..and who is there to blame you ask??? well me of course.. i'm not naive or ignorant to my bad habits.. just inable to say no..(no pun intended)..
So my point is this.. regret or not regret?.. most people believe that everything has a purpose.. teach a lesson.. help you grow, watever.. but what about when things dont just happen, when you made the choices.. and why should you regret something that you enjoyed? why regret anything at all? it wont change what happened or what you did.. so why not get on the ride and throw your hands up?? oh yea.. because of consequences and the possiblity that no one will care to look past your decisions made.. hmm what a pickle

Posted by kayco on 2008-08-01 02:21:29 | Rating:

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		I don't know how old you are but you seem to have quite a lot of insight. Good for you. It shows intelligence and perhaps the wish to have things different? You were right about consequences, of course. The one consequence, apart from the obvious ones of physical and mental health, is age. One can throw up ones hands and enjoy the ride (and indeed one should sometimes) but what happens twenty years from now? We all need to build some foundation for our future. This can take the form of marrying the right person, but also in building a solid financial background. I believe that you will make better decisions now that you have recognized what poor decisions are. It's all part of growing up, so don't be hard on yourself.
Posted by 9roses on 2008-08-01 05:34:12


		Kayco, as you have stated, regret or not to regret. Regret affects the spiritual side of our lives while no regret involves the physical side. The problem with the physical side of life is this it often involves pleasure, but only for the moment. It seems from your post that you do understand, from a certain degree, cause and effect. So I have listed from my “Creating a Mindset” series The Domain of Divine Laws First understand that everything we do in life has the potential to make us better. This is why the law of cause and effect is the potential for the greatest good. “For every action there is an equal or greater reaction” “For every continued action there is a compounding reaction” “For every dispersed action there is a multiplying reaction” “The Law of Cause and Effect states; the choices we make each day have authority over the physical realm of our lives, which is the potential for the greatest good. This is where we experience the growing pains of life”. and second is the understanding of the law of sowing and reaping is the teaching of the greatest good. “We will reap what we sow” “We will reap more than we sow” “We will see others reap from what we sow” “The Law of Sowing and Reaping states; because of the choices we make each day the spiritual realm of our life is influenced, which is the teaching of the greatest good. This is where we learn the lesson of life”. and last we come to the law of unity, which of course is the greatest good. “Connecting with Divinity” “Connecting with the Divinity in yourself” “Connecting with the Divinity in each other” “The Law of Unity states; we must establish conformity in the physical world to that of the spiritual world in order to create harmony within, which is the greatest good. This is where we enter into that state of being that binds us to all that is perfect, all that is in harmony with the Creator and the created”. Is sex a bad thing? I would think not. Is promiscuous sex a bad thing? I would think so. Not just because of the potential to spread disease (cause and effect), but for the reason that you cannot establish harmony between yourself and that of the creator. Lack of harmony in people’s lives is the biggest reason why people lack balance. I have not yet put my “Creating a Mindset” series on my site, but I have my series on Habit—Force there, and you did mention bad habits. This tells me you lack balance in your life, so if you want to change your habits read Habit—Force and forever live a life of freedom from bad habits.
Posted by bigd49 on 2008-08-01 09:32:27


		Hey, maybe there would have been a better way to gain the experiences and insight you now have in life, people, what works and doesn't but the choices you made and the route you took is over and done. You can bet that some, probably most never took a risk, never pushed the envelope, never explored what they really thought and desired. Course they will be the ones to rationalize their inability to go the limit and outright cowardice and that they are better than some others and deny their obvious shortcoming by putting down others and trying to bring them down to their level with the kind of hypocritical selfrighteous tactics you described. They are weak petty people who feel better about themselves by trying to make others they envy feel bad and guilty. Don't fall for it. Don't even give it much thought. Learn from your experiences and mistakes, become stronger with what you feel works for you, what provides you with what you need to move forward and is no ones business, continue, maybe more discretely, you know discrestion, and seek the company of more quality people. Leave the losers, those who never give but are takers to themselves. Those who probably put you down with their self righteous advice are probably shirkers of life, reality and responsibilities. Regret nothing in life that you did without malace and with no intention of hurting someone else. That's not to say you might not wish you could have done better or changed a few things, who hasn't? If they are hurt they choose to be, that's not your problem although they will attempt to make it so. However, you're not young and niave anymore. Use your experiences to make better choices, your choices, be discrete about those choices if need be, and live life wisely but to the limits at times. You'll find much later in life, maybe when it's about over that the real regrets you'll likely have will be not doing more of what you like or wanted to do, worring about other's opinions and not doing what you want or feel is right, and not doing more, not less. But, again, stay healthy if possible and never intentionally hurt another that dosn't deserve it.
Posted by factual on 2008-08-01 10:15:58


		Yo Wud up Koyco. I'm Chris Tapp but everyone calls me RobD. :p How R U doing today. So anyway cut I'll the small talk. Here is the thing the past is the past and you can't change that all you can do is look to the future and learn from the past so dont you EVER hold any regrets and only ask yourself one thing was it worth it? if your willing to accept the consequences for your actions then you never have to question them.
Posted by RobD on 2008-08-01 11:23:30


		im right there with you sister. my repuatation plummeted WAY to early for something SO STUPID that i shouldnt have done so young. it took YEARS to get my reputation and popularity back. its funny how people drop you so quickly. great friends huh? well, my answer is dont regret. if you are in a place of your life right now and youre happy, then all that led you there. if you're not happy, think of how you got there and change it. you cant regret the past because you cant take it back. you have to grit and bear through all that bullshit and move on. i bet you dont even talk to those people anymore. if you are still in high school and you do, trust me you wont down the road. so dont sweat it...millions of people dont know about you, so how cares about the few hundred. they dont even really care, its just stupid high school drama.
Posted by riee87 on 2008-08-01 12:53:58


		realisation is important you strayed in younger years.it happens, past is past, what is important is the present, adopt awareness, alertness,knowledge meditation n grace for every problem you face.
Posted by tseten123choe on 2008-08-02 01:59:51


		i say don't fret over past mistakes/choices. don't regret any of it either!! you only have one life, right? LIVE it! :)
Posted by JustADreamerxoxo on 2008-08-02 03:03:35


		I believe you will and should regret your mistakes until you learn from them. Awareness and acceptance are two very different things. I'm not saying you should change a behavior you feel is right for you. Even focusing more on discretion or with whom you choose to do such things or even to learn why you use sex in this way and embodying it as a part of you earns you the right to move beyond regret.
Posted by Zahrakanika on 2008-08-02 12:53:37


		thank you so much for all of your replies and i hope to adress them as i continue to read further into them. your words and advice truly do help, thanks =]
Posted by kayco on 2008-08-02 15:20:04


		i feel for you but sometimes i here it isnt awful if you love them is that true
Posted by nicegrl on 2008-08-02 18:21:05


		I would definitely made better choices in my life. I have lots of regrets and I don't know anyone that doesn't...I try not to make the same mistakes again...NOTE I SAID 'TRY'!
Posted by lastblastkl on 2008-08-02 20:14:15