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So she broke up with me again

Hello...

She broke up with me again... pretty much 2 month's after the last time. 2 month's and one day after the last time. I guess I really ran her nerves. I don't get it though. Long story short... I vented and said everything i needed to say to her and nobody else. She seemed not happy but I guess able to accept the fact I was trusting her with the issues I was having. She even told me she was letting me vent because I never vent with her and I always go to other people. So I felt good.

At the end of the phone conversation I did tell her I hoped that my venting wouldnt push her away... she said she wasnt sure if it would. Can you say..."hu?!" I thought I was doing the right thing. Turns out it was the wrong thing to do the entire time. What I thought was venting to the woman I love... (Which is what she did all the time with me when it came to personal issues)... as to which i litsened even if i didnt agree and I would comfort her or try to most of the time and reassure her things would be ok... turned out to be my worst enemy... the worst thing to do. I wish I could go back and stop myself from starting the conversation. Which if anyone cares was about me and my jealousy. I was trying to explain to her why I got jealous and so forth.

I have been with her and I have loved her for 3+ years. I am truly heartbroken. She broke up with me about 4 minutes after we spoke on the phone... stating she didnt like the jealousy thing and that it just didnt go with her. I asked her what she means and she said that we should just be friends. ** bomb drops **

I am at a lost for words. I didnt think me telling her my feelings would turn out to be the breakup I was blocking with as much power as possible.

I trust her more than anything in this world... The jealousy has nothing to do with trust. She was spending too much time with one of her friends.. her best friend. I will give you a percentage of 90% with her 10% with me. Anyways....

I dont know what to do. I am completely confused. I thought I was doing the right thing. I wasnt. I am heartbroke. It was so easy to let me go.

She would always tell me if I wanted to vent I should sometimes write it in paper. Maybe that's what I should have done. Maybe I should have gotten on here and just typed away. I guess it's too late. She was my life... and she has taken my life from me.

I once read that women in general... chose friends over their bf's. I guess I had to live it to believe it.

I guess the question now is... How do I act? How do I feel from this point on? Is it ok to be angry? Confused? Sad?

If anyone took the time to read this and has an opinion. Let me know.

Sincerely,
Heartbroken

P.S. Grown men do cry.

Posted by kataclizmic on 2008-06-27 04:24:01 | Rating: