Dear Friends,
This is to shar what happened last week. Please tell the people u love how much importnt they are in life. Coz time never waits for you to do it.
"You do not really know what you have until u loose it"...I do hear these sort of statements now and then. I am in a diffrent state of mind right now. It seems like there is a whole diffrent world in here. Its been 4 long rough days since my nani (Granny) paseed away. I feel sad coz it was a sudden shock for me & my family. But at the same time, I am relieved by the fact that she passed away withought too much miseries. I kept staring at her face when she was lying on the death bed and it made me reminisce all the good tymes I spent with her. She was attached too much wid me coz wen my grandpa (nana) died, I was still in my mom's womb. I guess I always had that special treatment & love flowin' on me.
 Coming back to da day wen I went for her funeral (In hindus, we burn the dead body...These days we have these huge dome shaped chamber, which produces flames through electricity)...Co incidently, I was the chosen one who last touched her feet. It was heart breaking to see her sleeping in these huge flames. But since that day...I have this special zone in my mind, where I love to go. I freequently wander there....&^ wen I am there, I feel almost nothing. This is possible coz it happened recently & my mind needs time to rethink on all this as well as adapt to live without talking to or watching her no more.
I feel like she went there to god justr to make my life better...She must have definately asked him once to forgive the sins I have done...All I am thinking about now is to be better than what she always wanted me to be...If not better, atleast upto that mark. She is watching me from somewhere & I am scared when I smoke. I know she doesn't like it (Coz no one knows) but I can't help the way I feel. So wat I do? I smoke.
I just want to carry on doing wat I like now. Rather than bein a "Mr.NICE" 2 every1...Coz afterall, all matters in your life is your family & a very few chosen riends. I am even glad that this whole incidence helped me to know who is who & what people should or must be in my priority list. "EVEN DISASTERS TEACH VALUES SOMETIMES". Nani I know you might be reading my mind wen I am writng this...I just wanted to tell u that..."I love you...I didn't like when you tried to teach me some small but important things in my life (How stupid I was to judge you as you were interfirin a lot..I am sorry! f'give me) But now I understand what you meant to do...I cannot promise but I have faith in myself, Your holly soul & god that I will become a better man. (NEED YOUR STRENTH TO QUIT THIS OCCATIONAL SMOKING TOO). You will always shine like a star in my memories! My you be free from all these reioncarnation things n may you rest in peace!
 Your dearest grandson,
JD
GoD BlEs$
PeAcE
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