yes. but we all are. you'll outgrow it though. then you'll just be bored.

Try to see how good you are now. Try to be strong and fight this fight. It is not a good thing. You need to feel empowered in different ways. I don't have anorexia but I do struggle with self esteem issues. Try to use your writing and other ways to push through the struggle. You can do it. You have done it. Don't allow yourself to go back there.

From your profile pic, I can see that you are already rather thin but strikingly beautiful! Model-esque, even. You need to do whatever it takes to break the chain in your mind. I don't know what causes this...but you and all those here who wear "ANA" on their shirts need to stop this. It's a painful endless cycle unless you just listen to your body instead of the mirror. If you must, don't even look at any mirrors. Just do what your body wants. Trust your appetite. Feed it what it wants. If you were a bigger person, you would be. If you were lazy and unproductive, you might gain weight. But, you are fine as you are.

Maybe you just need to take your mind off your body and put thoughts elsewhere. Do things that make you feel good about WHO you are...not WHAT you are.

you are so pretty <3
no worries