Hi I haven't be here in a while, there are so many things going on round here recently that hurt so much that even writing is hard.
We went away as planned this last weekend for Easter.  My middle daughter was working and couldn't come with us so she stayed at home.  On Easter Sunday she tried to take her life.  We don't know why, I know her M.E has caught up on her and she was recently told she couldn't apply for a drivers licence, she has bought a motorbike and it was a severe blow when she found out she will never ride it.  She has all the relevant teams working with her to keep her safe, though because she is 18 we as parents have no rights to know what is going on unless she says, she is a lovely girl, beautiful and full of care and compassion for everybody she meets.  She brings joy into a gray day, why should this happen? We are devastated.. though thankful that she survived, we could have been arranging a funeral right now.  My husband and I do not know how to deal with this, she has cut her arms from elbow to wrist in frustration and control.. apparantly it helps her sleep.  She has got rid of the glass that she used to cut her arms with and I bought her some Bio Oil for the scars, she knows summer is coming and hopes they fade.. so I guess that shows she wants to get better, but the depression takes hold quickly and I am scared.
My youngest got beaten up at school last week, we have had to take it to the Police and press charges for assult as the school cannot do anything.. bloody government prefers to protect the bully rather than the victim.  Bless her she still can't eat properly and may have a slight chip in the jaw bone, no xrays have been taken as the doctor wants to wait and see if it heals on its own.. !!!!!! It all comes down to finances.. NHS.. yeah right, payed into it all my life and yet can't get a flaming xray when needed.
Well thats my life right now.. I know in amongst this I should be grateful, but sometimes it's hard, so very hard to keep rising above it, to stand tall and count blessings.. 
Keep safe x