i don't get it. i don't understand praying, or anything about it really. when people say "pray for me" or "your in my prayers" is that the same thing as just saying "you're in my thoughts"? or is there some special thing about praying? i'm not relgious. this doesn't mean i'm a terrible person or that i think it's okay to steal or lie. i just don't believe in these higher powers. if someone could please explain to me how praying works, that would be amazing. is a person praying expecting their prayers to be answered? for instance, if it is the world cup soccer finals and fans of both teams are praying to win, obviously both teams will not be satisfied. i know that seems like a silly thing to pray about, but it happens all the time. or praying for less mosquito bites. i just don't get it. why not just saying oh yes i'd love for my team to win, or wow it'd be great to have less mosquito bites. because by praying i feel like this is just putting this in God's hands, as if he can magically make everything okay.

i'm not saying i think all praying is like this. i just don't understand prayers and how they are supposed to work. i guess people do it just in hopes of results, knowing it may not happen, or maybe it will happen.

i don't get it. i know lots of people pray everyday for various things, and i'd just like to know why you do it, or what makes you do it. maybe i do it too, i just don't think of it as praying. i think about my loved ones who have passed away recently quite a bit. sometimes i even talk to them as if they were sitting with me in my car. i guess it's different in that i don't address God, but simply whoever i want to talk to.

i have a friend who has just started going to a christian church about 6 months ago. she is mildly obsessed, praying all the time, reading the bible in her free time. i have a hard time relating to her now, because she has changed so much in the past six months. she has gone from the MOST freespirited, carefree, sweet person i've ever met to the most careful and self conscious girl. i feel like her friends she goes to church with judge her for not knowing as much as they do, so it makes her work harder. i don't understand what comfort this brings when really it's just more judgement than in just a regular high school or society.

for instance, she recently started dating a boy who goes to church with her. however, one of her other friends confronted her about this and how it was not honoring God to date this boy while she knows she will go off to college next fall and most likely break up. this shook her up quite a bit. i wish she was more comfortable and solid in her own beliefs, enough to make those decisions for herself. i worry about how vulnerable she is and how these church friends can totally make her whatever they want her to be right now.
i miss her.