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hazeleyes85's Blogs in August 2009

August...finally...
yay! it is finally August! My birthday is coming up. WooHoo!! I don't know what to do though... hmmm. I would love to see Toby Keith in concert, but fat chance of that. School is going great, I always have lots of homework wcich is fine......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-03 11:50:16 | Rating:

| Views: 19 | Comments: 2 | Tags: life

Poker Face....?
Lady Gaga- Poker face.... the song playing on my MP3 right now...seems quite appropriate for my life in that I feel like I am putting on a poker face in my life. I am not happy in my life right now. I mean, yes there are a few things in my life that are good, but still they don't make me very......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-04 10:02:13 | Rating:

| Views: 25 | Comments: 1 | Tags: marriage life depression

You say.....
You say we are friends, You say you still care. You said you loved me, but the feelings were never there. You say that you miss me and that we need another chance. You say it would be wonderful if we could be friends with benefits. You say it would be wonderful if we could FUCK!......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-04 14:16:29 | Rating:

| Views: 26 | Comments: 2 | Tags: poem friendship

Life..and the craziness in my head...
Today I have a lot on my mind. I took a test today and I think i did ok.. but not great!! I need to concentrate on my schooling more, but I have to much shit going on. My husband has been leaving at night the past couple nights for about and hour or so at a time. He says he is going to......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-05 12:12:36 | Rating:

| Views: 28 | Comments: 1 | Tags: depression life suicide

Fuck you.....
FUCK YOU!! thats all I really want to say to my husband. I read his messages on his phone last night.... He was texting some girl named Stephanie... he told her he didn't know if him and I would work out... WHAT?! Thats news to me from him...DO i tell him I read it? I tried talking to him this......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-10 08:40:13 | Rating:

| Views: 40 | Comments: 5 | Tags: anger marriage

Broken....
Today is a blogging kind of day. I am drained, emotionallly, physically, mentally.... blah. Thats all i feel is blah... How can someone go from being so happy and so in love to feling nothing all the time? I hate my life and where i have been and where I am headed. I need a change for the......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-10 12:08:59 | Rating:

| Views: 21 | Comments: 2 | Tags: life

The more things change...
I have come to realize that it is true that the more things change, the more they stay the same.... For instance... I got divorced from my first husband because of games, lies, cheating (or intent to do so) etc... and now I am in my 2nd marriage and all the same things are happening. I go back......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-11 09:48:39 | Rating:

| Views: 23 | Comments: 2 | Tags: life challenges

Long days..short nights...and head games
Long days and short nights are so not good for me, I have been going to bed late and waking up way to early!! I took my best friend to her meeting place for her trip...at 4 am! AHHH I am soo tired! I had a lot on my mind last night and could not get confortable on the couch bed I slept......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-13 09:51:10 | Rating:

| Views: 17 | Comments: 4 | Tags: life

ALONE.......
Today I went to the movies..alone. I ate dinner alone..... I feel like such a loser. My best friend is on her trip, I hope she is having a blast! I am so lonely right now. I feel like crying all fucking day. Especially after the movie... I hate doing things like alone It's depressing. I......Read More

Posted on: 2009-08-15 22:22:04 | Rating:

| Views: 37 | Comments: 5 | Tags: life

Change needs to come...
And I do mean now. I am so frustrated. I found another text from me husbands ex. She said " you look very unhappy, why don't you get an annulment and come back so we can raise our daughter together" I did not find his response since he deleted the all... I am so confused on what to......Read More