This is my first post in life... but i expect it to be a bit shorter than my thinking..which seems to never end...

People think that the day begins in morning, but for me it happens at night. It's the time I decide that I should not be me tomorrow because sometimes I find myself not a part of this world..and so I make few promises to myself that I will and I should not do few things from tomorrow onwards. Then I go off to sleep on a happy note believing that I will stick to what I said....

I wake up before my alarm starts shouting but I still lie there till it actually starts shouting and then I decide to finally get up... Sometimes I wonder why do I need an alarm...

I check my mobile for calls and messages which I have missed while I was sleeping.. though in my mind i really know that I am checking my importance on this planet..

I look out of my window wondering where the world is really busy.. Sometimes I really wonder if they are actually busy or are they trying to be one.. I really don't wanna care about that because nobody really inspires me on that notion..

I promise to self that today I am not gonna call my busy girl friend who do not care about my whereabouts and well being...but in case she calls up first.. I wonder if i would be able to carry forward my attitude and manly ego anymore with her...her one tiny call to me will make me call her atleast 10 times throughout the day..it melts me dwn you see.

I reach my office.. attend few phone calls of clients who wanna place few orders...Being the owner and boss of my company I allot work to workers and sit idle for rest of the day... I wish I could be like the lowest paid worker in my office..who seems to be the most busiest one in my company... Atleast he does not get the time to get bothered by the rest of the world..

I reach back home, look myself  into a mirror and remember my high school days when I use to have a very good physique..I satisfy myself by saying that I don't look bad..but actually for the world my body is like a warehouse of fat...hence I don't look at my body anymore, I just look at my face...

Before going to bed like an insecured lamb I realise that my girlfriend has not called me for quite some time..I know that the day I stop calling her she would surrender herself to me. But i think I am addicted to her without any good reason.. So I wait for her call according to her comfort.. But I wonder why I have to wait...

So now I am on my bed and here comes the time to conclude my day... there have been so many things which I planned to change in myself.. But I never do that... I do not know why I don't do that... hence I say it to me:: I am what I am... BUT I DON'T WANNA BE ME.....and someday I wont be me... I might become like rest of the world...OR..the world will become like me..