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| Lock Your Teenage Girls in The Basement
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I put this song on my ipod yesterday (the video is just a crappy mess though so close your eyes and listen), and I swear I can’t stop listening to it. And I’m not usually into electropopish songs. But what’s not to like in a song about a girl who gets drunk off her ass in a club? Exactly, NOTHING!
So I was informed by my sister that the Jonas Brothers came to Canada a few days ago, and this morning they replayed their live interview at MuchMusic, which is like the Canadian MTV, though we do have an MTV but it’s just called MTV Canada not MuchMusic (confused? Good). I watched it during breakfast this morning, they shut down Queen St. so they could have the interview outside, because no way in hell could all of those girls fit into one building. I was stunned. Tween and Teenage girls galore, a pedophiles certified wet dream! It was like, the second coming of Jesus, as my Grandma would say. All the screaming and crying girls with declarations of love abound, it almost seemed like those three teenage boys came damn close to putting Jesus to shame (not to be blasphemous or anything, just saying). I was just waiting for some girls to start throwing palm leaves and offering to wash their feet. Well, they are boys who wear skinny jeans and they have song lyrics that say things like, ‘you broke my heart in two, and now I can’t find the other half’ and ‘when you look me in the eyes, I catch a glimpse of heaven.’ I know they sound like the types that my dad would point to on the street and go, ‘Hey Jessie, there’s a hemo’ (he means emo). But man, they are smooth for males who can’t grow beards (no pun intended, really). Those lyrics are much better than ‘Hey.’
And this is how I figured out what The Brain could not. (Pause for effect.) How to take over the world! In order to do this, you need only one thing, or a lot of one thing. Teenage girls.You must harness the power of the Teenage girl, and only then, will you be truly unstoppable. I’m almost positive that if teenage girls stopped being so bitchy to each other and came to recognize their power, we’d all be screwed (I say ‘we’ because I’m like, five seconds away from crossing into the 20-year old threshold. And by five seconds I mean 7 months).
Aaand, now I have the Pinky and the Brain song stuck in my head. Narf.
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Posted by gremas on 2008-07-05 06:58:20 | Rating: | Views: 28
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