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ANATOMY OF DIVORCE - A Eulogy

ANATOMY OF DIVORCE

When your ship sits at the bottom of the ocean, does it matter if the hole in the hull is small or large?

All ships and boats have some sort of hull leakage. All vessels require a steady and constant effort to pump or bail to keep your boat afloat. When those bailing principals are exercised, you not only keep your boat afloat but also allow for its propulsion through dangerous waters safely preserving both your precious passengers and your valued cargos.

Within the Anatomy of Divorce, is a destructive, rusting element that eats away at the very hull of your family, bringing about a porous cancer. As the flooding waters fill your ship and it slowly (or rapidly) sinks, certain profound and healthy principals are summarily traded-off or sold at small price.

In the absence of love, the bailing effort ceases & indifference becomes the substitute.
In the absence of serving, intolerance stands-out as the predominate feature.
In the absence of sincere communication, harsh words and cold, caustic attitudes prevail.
In the absence of selfless sacrifice, selfish grabs & material concerns take over your life.
In the absence of civility, the war / the battle and the intent to win are primary goals,
     far more important than any other concern. More important than even the most
     precious of passengers and cargo. Who (or how many) get harmed, is overlooked.
     In the absence of genuine concern, is an inability to admit or accept any culpability and
     adopted is a vindictive need to inflict punishments, rather than offer any form of
     forgiveness or assume any form of responsibility.
In the absence of listening & hearing, a deafened ear is turned to all who’s voices matter.
In the absence of personal humility, is the ugliness of indignation and self-righteousness.
     Such acidic ugliness infects all aspects of normal behavior. It spills-over to overrule
    personal accountability and responsibility within the destruction / disassembly of
     vows, promises and eternal commitments.

Within the Anatomy of Divorce, in discarding the effort, in wielding the hammer of destruction, is no element of healthful, uplifting personal growth. There are only weeds taking-over where flowers once filled our gardens. Only personally disfiguring scars and hardened hearts come from the trade-offs in the exercise and usage of incorrect principals. Those remaining scars seem to foment and deliver an ever growing, never ending pain.

The precedent / example that is set before a family shows everyone that the tools of change and hardened resolve are not found in the use of Correct Principals but found in courts of cold and calculated judges. The counselors and spiritual advisors who profess and teach of the ultimate value of family are tossed-out in preference of the harsher tools of lawyers with profit incentives to see your ship securely rested on the bottom of the ocean.

The president / example delivered to children and grandchildren is one of harsh divisions, inflexibilities and vicious unforgiving judgmentalisms. In dismissing Correct Principals and adopting alternative pathways our lives can’t help but be changed for the worse. We cannot emerge unscarred or un-tarnished. No one can benefit.

Within the Anatomy of Divorce there is also a trade-off of words. The death-blow of an eternal marriage is re-named as the dissolution of a union. Selfish materialism converts a family home to property division. Even defining family takes on an assignment and determination as disposable. Euphemisms that intend to soften the blow only mask the realities and the culmination of failures. Adopted is an attitude of acceptance of failure and defeat. Such an element of acceptability serves only to relieve the effort and responsibility of constant and steady bailing and gives the appearance of an easier, albeit less rewarding, more personally harmful path.

Within the Anatomy of Divorce is a once mighty ship sitting on the bottom of the ocean and a broken family in its wake.

G. M. Rodgerson