| View Blog
|
|
|
|
| This is my story |
It was July 3rd. I was standing in Lowes with my husband looking at sprinklers when the doctor called to give me the news that my MRI had turned up a meningioma. I had no idea what a meningioma was, so I dutifully asked the doctor to spell it for me (so I could write it down) and tell me, basically, what it was. He hesitated before telling me that a meningioma was a type of brain tumor. Up until that point my only concern was not to have the only brown lawn on the street for the 4th of July holiday. Needless to say this news made the state of my lawn completely irrelevant.
My tumor was discovered in very undramatic fashion. I had no seizures or violent episodes. Instead, the process started during a visit to my optometrist for a routine eye exam. It had only been 10 months since my last one, but in that period the vision in my left eye had decreased dramatically. I put my declining vision down to the increased strain on my eyes during my last semester of college (I graduated just weeks before) and middle-age (after all, I was approaching 45). The doctor was not so convinced. He could see no changes in my eyes consistent with the decrease in visual acuity. My next stop was a neuro-ophthalmologist. He ordered an MRI, and sure enough, there it was: a bright white ball behind my left eye pressing directly on my optic nerve.
I had surgery to remove the tumor July 23rd. It went relatively well; after all, I’m still here. But there were complications. Several of the cranial nerves associated with the eye were traumatized, meaning they didn’t work. Cranial nerves, I soon learned, are the nerves that control the movements of the eye. One nerve controls the opening and closing of the eyelid. Another moves the eye left and right; and yet another, up and down. My left eye was, for all intents and purposes, paralyzed for months. The eyelid finally opened around Thanksgiving, but the eye still looks off to the left giving me double-vision. I have to wear a piece of tape over the left lens of my glasses in order to see just one of everything.
Another problem was that they weren’t able to get the whole thing. Roughly 30 percent of the tumor is still in there and my latest MRI shows that it has already grown two millimeters since August. I start radiation in a week to try and kill it once and for all.
That said, it's not all bad. I'm apply for Grad School to begin in the fall. I'm active in the community. I'm taking German lessons. I have a fabulous husband and a son who would make any mother proud. I'm a fighter and I will get through this.
Writing this blog is not only a way for me to vent, but hopefully it will bring a bit of understanding about what a meningioma is and what it isn’t. It is a place to sort through emotional issues as well as physical ones. It’s a place where I can face, head on, who I am now and who I hope to be in the near future. I also hope it will help other women facing the same issues know that they are not crazy and they are not alone.
|
|
Posted by glowworm on 2008-01-18 12:52:59 | Rating: | Views: 443
|
|
| |
|
|
Email This to a Friend 