January 7 2008

I don't watch as much TV as some people I know, but there are still things about television that really puzzle me.  Perhaps somebody who reads this blog can explain them to me.

1. Why is it that, whenever there is a news story about people dying horribly in a fire, the next commercial that comes on is always for oven cleaner or for Shake N Bake?

2. Why is it that those starships on Andromeda and on Star Trek don't seem to have bathrooms aboard?  (Those interstellar voyages must seem to take a really LONG time.)

3. Why does that guy on the weather channel always grin when he tells us that a killer storm is approaching?

4. If household cleaning products are really so safe, then why did all of Mr. Clean's hair fall out?

5. Why do those women in the hair coloring commercials always seem to be having orgasms when they fip their hair?

6. Why are almost all TV programs written for viewers who have the intelligence level of peat moss?

7. Why don't those people on the CSI shows ever wash their hands either before or after performing autopsies?

8. Given the excitement level of most "reality" shows, why hasn't someone thought of a program where we simply watch people clean up the poop while they're walking their dogs?  (To make it really gripping, there could be a singing or dancing competition for the dogs.)

I guess I'm just not sophisticated enough to enjoy television.

George

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