Sometimes when I think of you…I find myself holding my breath…like my body is afraid to release you from its memory.
Sometimes, I wonder if this is our forever. We used to believe in a different kind of forever…where it was you and me against the world.
Now the word forever seems to have changed form.
Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever see you again. I’ve memorized your eyes. They stare me down when I spend too much time lurking in my thoughts.
I wonder if someone is loving you better these days. I used to think no one could love you like I do. No one could love you better, harder, purer.
No one.
When I was living in my fantasy world…I believed my love could heal all your wounds. Could it be that my love just opened them wider…made you bleed harder?
I hear your laugh when I’m really quiet…and it makes me smile. And the way it always ended with a sigh…like a sorrow masked by laughter.
Your sorrow was never sweet, no matter how beautiful I thought you looked when you cried.
Sometimes…my heart still hurts. Sometimes I miss you so fucking much I think I may just break…into a million little pieces.
But just sometimes.
Sometimes I wonder if you think of me.
Do I cross your mind? Does a smell, a sound stir your soul and reawaken you?
Do you remember who we were…or who we aspired to be?
Sometimes I forget that you’re gone…and want to share with you…just the mundane things of life. You were always interested in the mundane me, the boring me…the tragic me…the fukt up me. The disaster that was me. All of me.
Sometimes it’s hard to go from being your world…to nothing at all.
Beautiful.
I know exactly where your coming from...
I've been wanting to write something like this, but I'm unable to write them down as easily as they escape my lips.
so thank you =)