I was sitting here reading a book and I realized it was six months ago today my brother died. That's an anniversary I didn't ever want to have. I know if it was my six month d-day he would be out plastered at 0800 but I think I am going to play it cool. Spend some time with the kids, get some reading in. Maybe watch Choke, a movie based on a Chuck Palahnuik book, one of my favorite authors. Basically just chill. But I will be telling stories about him to my kids all day, like everyday and I will try to tell good stories with my parents.
My older daughter just came in the room, she is pretty aware of life and death and I try not to hold anything back, at least as far as a four year old mind can take. I try not to influence her thinking of what happens after death but when it does come up, I delicetly tell her I think people live on in our hearts but that they are gone forever in more or less terms. So I told her that I was writing something about Uncle Ryan and told her it was six months ago today he died. She made a sad face, said she missed Uncle Ryan and then smiled and said "Today can be Uncle Ryan day!" Talk about turning a frown upside down. It's now officially Uncle Ryan day and I am off to buy them a shitload of candy, just like he would have.
See you all later
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