beast came to visit me at work!!  it was crazy....i called him cuz i was thinking about him & a couple of min into the convo
 
beast --> 'u work in gc right?'  

me --> 'yeah...well in the building above it, but yeah..........why?'

beast --> 'i'm in gc right now....'

::gasp:: - the butterflies hit me straight away & i didn't kno what to do or say hahaha 

me --> 'u are!?!' 

beast --> 'yeah...how do i get to u?' (or something like that)

so he came up to see me!!  it was like a dream.... i felt bad cuz i couldn't really bring him anywhere that we could have privacy....so we stood in reception for a min...he handed me my phone....showed me his pass from security....gol....he's so adorable i can't stand it!  and the urge to pounce on him was almost uncontrollable.... we were standing really close & i didn't really notice until i saw wen walk by & then i got kind of hyper aware of everything.... funny enough, just as i saw wen i was saying to him 'i wanna be all up on u right now but i can't & it's driving me nuts!'  gol  every thought i've had about him & a ton of flashbacks came swarming into my head as i looked in his eyes....i could feel him against me even though we were standing apart from eachother..which actually always happens when i'm close to him but usually i can act on my impulse without hesitation.... i wanted to bring him back over to my desk but people are so damn nosy.... it was bad enough when my dad came over to my desk the day he had the interview.... ::sigh::  part of me is chastising myself for not being bolder & just saying eff it, come back to my desk.... but i probably would have gotten in trouble for having a visitor during biz hours that's not a client or prospective client.... :o/  i'm sure he understands & knows the deal... corporate america....u gotta love it. 

anyway i wonder if he came over this way just to see me.... i wonder if he was surprised that i called him when he was about to come up....was he about to call me?  or was it just coincidental?  he said he was 'in the neighborhood'.... i can't believe he remembered where i work gol...i don't remember telling him gc in specific...altho i may have since there is a nysc downstairs.... i kno i mentioned that i work close to one of the gyms he teaches a class at & on saturday i had made the comment about working on park ave when we were on park ave.... it doesn't matter...he remembered where i work & he came to visit me!!  gol its going to take every ounce of my self control not to jump on him when i see him in class tonight!  i'm sure i'll get a little time with him afterward....still tho... damnit!  gol  i wish i could see him now!!    man....he's got me so..... just got me.  i don't kno how to explain it....  i think i kinda touched it on saturday.....there was that time he said to me 'it's good to be home....'  and i don't kno why i held back but i wanted to say 'it's good to have u home.'  i think he knew/heard me tho.... either way, that's the best way to describe how it feels with him - like home. 

i don't kno why i'm still so scared.  logically it makes sense but i'm usually good at letting go & getting over things quickly....especially things i don't like about myself or things i want to change about myself... i don't kno.  it's alot i guess.

lately alot of people have been commenting on how proud/impressed they are that greg & i turned out the way we did all things considered.  i often wonder how that happened myself.  gol  either way, i'm proud & glad for it also. 

omg i really can't stop thinking about him....i love how he smells....i adore his skin....his hands....arms....neck...shoulders....chest...stomach....legs...what he does to me...the conversations we have....the understanding we have....everything.   now i start to miss him before i even leave him....

i still can't get over this morning.....i felt so loved!!  gol  i wish i was back there right now. 

well, i've got some time to kill & lots of work to do that fell to the wayside today because i was wrapped up in beast  --> ::tsk tsk::