Another dumb fucking move on her part,or rather me letting her lead me around like a bull with a ring in its noise.She still has a concern for her son,who dumps on her.We went to a indian casino in eagle pass texas. Virtually no comps except a meal comp where you have to earn 1500 point. We drove over 4 hr to get there to this dingy little town on the mexican border.Then you drive down some back coutry roads to get here .My wife (she) likes this place

Why compared to Delta Downs in lousiana.Good comps,free room free food.Etc etc.In reality its all a waste,gambling Double your points on your slot card.She blows a wheelbarrow load of money on the slots. I don,t want to put her down because of this.

So the casino in eaglepass sucks

Speaking of which: Iam in deep shit with her she lays around on the couch,sickly,and frail.No life except to spend money No I don,t mean to make fun of her condition(kidney disease) but you have to get up and start doing things.

I spent time with her yesterday and frankly I really could just go(yes I must have said this a hundred times before) I have such a hard restence to somebody fucking me over that I wonder what would make me crack.

There are those send you to hell speeches.Its not like I don,t see it coming.

There is so much that could be done.She is bored,out of the work force. Existing on my Gov retirement and my salary in my civ job I could try I suppose but I stay in a complacent,depressed stage.Like tonight they call up and ask if I want to work somewhere else and instead of just saying I couldn,t here I go again afraid to hurt someones feeling,althogh mine can get hurt (oh baby)

Oh well making some toast,I lied to her about where Iam going on overtime.Its a stupid way to escape her at night,why not face her and get it over with.yea yea sure I sometimes get tired of hearing myself say this
_________________________________________________