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today is the worst day of my life....i'm so depressed rite now, that if i had the balls to kill myself, i would.
it all started this morning...
mom grounded me from the tv b/c i didn't do my chores yesturday, but me being myself i watched tv ne ways. i remembered that i had recorded some of my shows in my mom's room so i decided to watch them. so i went in her room and started watching True life - I'm searching for my father. 1 person found their father, 1 person's dadd was dead, and the 3rd person didn't know her dad's name so she couldn't find him. i got inspired and i knew my dad's full name and what prison he got out of so i decided to search him on the internet. luckily it didn't take my 2 months like all of the other people did, it took my about 30 minutes. i found out that he lived in wetseka, illinois aboit 1hr and ahalf away from chicago. i got a number and i called but it was disconnected. i got an address, so i decided to writs a letter and talk to my mom about it when she got home. she got home and i was trying to tell her i just couldn't get it out of my system. finally when she was taking out the pizza i told her what i had done, about the call, the letter, EVERYTHING. she asked me to show the website and what i found, so i did. then i had to get her pizza and some napkins and bring downstairs to her. by the time i got down stairs sha was on watchdog.com a website for sex offenders. i knew my dad went to jail, i just didn't know for what and for how long. so i found out he was a sex offender. btw ( i was in foster care for 2 yrs and my brother decided to stay with a relative and never live w/ me and my siter again when we got out it had been 2 yrs. and my mom stopped letting me visit him) ne wayz i asked her who did he offend. she said that he offended my big sister Amanda and that he was the reason why we were in foster care, the reason why my brother Nick never came home. she had hoped to tell me when i was older, but since i was determind to find him she told me now. now i'm just sitting here typing determining if i should talked 2 him or not, my mom says if i want to talk 2 him she has no problem as long as i dont give him my nuber or address he lives on 72nd and i live on 100, so he's not far, not far at all... what should i do...i'm so depressed
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