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When i was a little girl i thought i would live a normal life and that i would enjoy all the things your suppose to. That's not how my life turned out. You see, I hold a secret...and till this day only i know.
It all started back when i was 12. I looked into my mirror and analysed myself. I saw a nose, two eyes, a mouth, olive clear skin and dark hair. I had arms legs and everything a normal child was given. However that thought of conscience that i held vanished when i was 14. I developed skin complications. Spots grew on my face and it got worse. There was no pore on my face that was not free from the radical. I felt no love for myself. I saw the way people looked at me and i saw shame and pity. Later on i learened to deal with it and carry it on as a burden. Then hair grew all over my body. Thick course hair everywhere. I clothed myself so no one would find out my curse. I'd cry sometimes but no one would hear. I missed my sports classes and formals because of this burden. I then came to the realisation that i would cure myself somehow some way i would.
When i turned 16 i met a boy who made me special although he had no clue of my disease i was repelled to tell him. He told me he liked me and i loved him dearly. Those memories were true. We got along so well i thought it was to good to be true. He made so many moves on me but i refused to make any so he left and ripped my heart out. I think i died that day. The day i found out he had another and that he was just leading me on...I would go to school everyday knowing i have a hole in my heart. Sometimes he was in the same room as me and wouldn't notice me. I was heart broken...
I hate this disease but i was given it for a reason. I might have it forever so i might as well get use to it.
The last i heard from this boy was that he now likes my bestfriend and so that would mean he no longer cares for me and he's over me. What we had meant nothing.
Right now, in my lfe i only focus on my dreams. To make my self beautiful and find my prince. And that prince would never leave me.
I dont know if i can complete my dreams and goals but this is my life and i'm the one living in this body so i can only hope i do the best i can.
I hope something good will happen as i have suffered for way to long. I'm starved from love...
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I didn't have a steady girlfriend 'til I was 23 yrs. old, because of shyness and serious lack of ideas to talk about.
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Posted by QuickHitGondolin
on 2008-02-01 02:22:59
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This is the best thing I've read as of yet of anyone in expressing themselves, I hope you find what your looking for in your dreams, anything is possible in life! Have a Great Day!!
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Posted by fromwithin
on 2008-02-01 03:26:36
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Thankyou so much! Means alot to me. I'm only 20 and im in a stage in my life where i'm eating healthy so now my spots have died out :) I'm still in the process of treatment and the healing of my heart and learning to love myself again. Its really hard and its not easy but im taking each day as it comes.
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Posted by eternal_bronze
on 2008-02-02 03:26:22
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I was going to add you as a friend but you don't have that option on your page so I'll leave it to you. Hope to read more on what you write. Have a Great Day!! "Smile"
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Posted by fromwithin
on 2008-02-06 13:38:23
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| Views: 66
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