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First off, read the entire thing before making any judgments.
About halfway through my ninth grade year, I started talking to this one girl(lets call her “Marie”. She was one of those people who didn’t seem to hang out with a lot of people(I wasn’t the most popular person in skool, but I hung out with a fair amount of people). She had some friends, but they seemed more of casual friends than strong friends. Marie tended to wear darker clothes, like she might have some “prep” shirts, but they were always darker colors.
Anyways, we had been doing this one class project, and her group did some stuff with mine, and we started talking in skool a bit, and also on myspace. As I talked to Marie, I realized how kool she seemed. She had a bit of a violent humor, could listen to(even make) perverted jokes without being disgusted, swore quite a bit, had a dominating air about her(She seemed pretty strong willed), and overall just seemed pretty damn kool. It was the end of the second quarter in skool when I first started talking to her, and it wasn’t till almost the end of the year that we really started hanging out(we had a total of like two classes together and, thanks to assigned seating, we typically weren’t close to each other). This was also the time that I first began developing a crush on her. Finally, we got relatively close within one class setting, and we were able to talk and get to know each other better(my god, I hated that class, but it was much better with her in there).
Marie had been single up to this point in time. Quite literally, on the last day of skool she started going out with this one kid(“Rob”) who had had a crush on her for awhile(he was my friend, but I really didn’t understand why they got together, they seemed too different – he was very hyper while she was much more reserved in her demeanor). Anyways, we continued to talk over myspace throughout the summer, but neither of us are big on talking on the phone, and distance wises, it was kind of hard for us to really hang out.
Once my sophomore year started, we began hanging out quite a lot more. Since I was already pretty good friends with Rob, us, two other kids, “Ron” and “BJ” who were like best friends with Rob and pretty good friends with me , and Marie would all hang out together. Ron and BJ were Marie’s best friends, with BJ being her very best friend. So, it was a pretty good group.
It was during this period that I became really good friends with Marie(I was essentially still a step below Ron and BJ though). We still didn’t hang out alot outside of skool, but we talked over myspace all the time, and always hung out at skool. We really began trusting each other during this period. I learned that she had a few self-harming tendencies, and this helped to change my view of certain types of people. Also, I found that if something I did bugged her, and she mentioned it, I was more than wiling to change(in other words, I quit “gay bashing”, saying certain vulgar words[none of the wondrous swear words though], and a few things like that). We began helping each other out more and more(for example, we had this one project in class that we were both working on individually, but mine essentially sucked, so, about three minutes before either of us had to go up and present, we agreed that if I did ninety percent of the talking, we go up as partners[we were allowed to but we had been working individually before] and use her nice-looking project). Somewhere during this period, her and Rob began having sex, too.
This was all good until BJ got a girlfriend(he was kind of one of those nerdy kids that are really into video games) and he started changing. I had never been great friends(more of casual friends with him, me and Ron were good friends though) with him, so I had no problem totally ditching him when Marie did. Ron, on the other hand, had a little bit more trouble with it, but he managed to stay friends with both of them. It was during the climax of this situation that I think I essentially took the place of BJ in relation to Marie(our friendship is different now than it was then, but at the time, that’s what it was like). That night, when her and BJ ceased to be friends, I must have spent at least three hours straight just talking to her on myspace. This was when I learned her deepest secret(lets just say something went terribly wrong in her life). She felt that it was her fault, in some way, and so I told her repeatedly that it wasn’t. I don’t know if it got through to her, but I truly hope it did. It was at that point, when she opened herself up to me completely, that I realized and decided that I loved her(as a friend) and that I would always be there for her. (When I first told her that I would always be there for her, she was like “that’s a big promise to make” and I was like “I know, I plan to always be there for you if you need me”[and I’ve kept good on that promise thus far, and plan to continue to do so]) Since that night, we haven’t talked about her past and that tragedy, for we both know of it, and it’s like a mutual silent agreement not to mention it ever again(if she ever needs to talk or anything, I’m obviously gonna be there for her, but I won’t ever bring it up).
The semester ended, and our group was down to four, instead of five. Me and Rob grew distant, for I didn’t really ever see him(due to classes), but we were still friends and were able to talk when we were around each other. Marie and Rob seemed to have a love-hate relationship. She used to get angry with him frequently, and they quarreled quite a bit. She was still pretty good friends with Ron.
However, Ron started really hanging out with this one group of kids who she didn’t like. I thought that most of the people were pretty decent, if they were by themselves, but they turned into assholes once they all got together. Marie just thought they were assholes.
So, slowly, Ron grew distant from Marie, and our friendship lessened a bit(we’re still pretty good friend, though). Finally, him and Marie had a falling out, and they have been bitter towards each other ever since. This left me as Marie’s only best friend.
By this point in time, Marie was one of my best friends(the only person I had her underneath on my myspace was a kid I’ve known for a few years over a decade and hang out with all the time). We hung out all the time in skool, and a little after skool. We were so close that people mistook us as a couple fairly often(she had more classes with me than she did with Rob, so we were together more). And yes, I still had a crush on her at this time. But, of course, our friendship always came first(it’s not like there was much I could do, she had a boyfriend).
The year ended, and summer began. I was gone halfway across the world with this one summer program for three weeks, and she was the only person I kept in real contact with throughout the trip(I called her twice, and the first time we talked for over two hours, and the second time we talked for about half an hour(the delay between when you said something and the other person heard it just got to annoying). In other words, she got two and a half hours of talk time, my other friend altogether got between a quarter of an hour and a half an hour, and my family got twelve minutes of talking to me). Once I got back, she broke the news to me that she might be pregnant(her period was being uber gay). Her boyfriend, Rob, was out of town for the next week or two, and she didn’t want to go and buy a pregnancy test herself, so she asked me(in a very demur manner[it’s not something you get asked every day]) if I would go out and buy them for her. I was like “Marie, I said I would always be there for you, so yeah, I’ll get them for you”. As you can see, we were pretty damn good friends. (she wasn't pregnant, either, her period is just loopy and weird)
Junior year rolled around, and her and Rob’s relationship fell to pieces. She began hanging out with one of Rob’s best friends, “Jay”. Rob began getting pretty angry when she would go and hang out with Jay, and like drive around or go and get coffee or whatnot. This really strained their relationship. Then, one day, she kissed Jay. Her and Rob decided to try and fix their relationship at that point, once she revealed that to him, but this failed terribly. After getting drunk one night, her and Jay had sex, and that was the end of her and Rob.
Despite her actions going against just about all my morals, I stuck by her side, as her best friend(I had told her I would, and I damn well meant it). Almost none of my friends wanted me to hang out with her anymore, but I really didn’t care. And, I still liked her.
There was about a month transition period in which she was single, but essentially going out with Jay. I almost think that Jay was a bounce back, or possibly a revenge thing. He was willing to say things to please her, do stuff for her(be “whipped”[just like how I do a lot of small things for her, so people always say I’m whipped by her]), and make promises to her. I dislike him. Like, he reminds me of myself in some ways(he has a sense of humor, is willing to do small things for Marie, etc), but with a lack of morals, a sense of over-pride(it’s like he doesn’t believe he can be wrong[except with Marie]), and more of a party side to him(according to Marie, I’m the “good kid” between me and her, whereas he goes out and drinks and does some drugs).
Anyways, they seem to fight quite a lot actually. It’s almost a repeat of her last relationship, in my opinion(both Rob and Jay are emotional crybabies, in my opinion, they fight over dumb shit with Marie, and almost break up from time to time and then don’t[but Jay is graduating this year, so maybe that’ll help sever their ties]). And that’s where she is now.
Now, for between Marie’s and my relation….we hang out all the time at skool, we actually talk on the phone from time to time, and sometimes after skool. She has become my very best friend, surpassing even my friend of over a decade, and I am still her very best friend(she doesn’t really have any other best friends, either). I help her out with the big things(the other day, she didn’t do a book report for this one class, so I sent her the report I had done earlier in the year so that she could just turn that one in[and she got a higher grade than what I got for my book report. Ironic, huh?]), and the small(picking up her pencil of she drops it, buying her something from a concert of her favorite band that she wasn’t able to make it to[with my own money]). She has always been there for me when I have needed her and she is the one person I know I can turn to to talk with if I really need to. For next year, we have coordinated our classes so that we can have the majority of them together(I think we got between two thirds and three fourths of them together next year). And, obviously, I still have that crush on her.
I want to know what your thoughts are on our relationship. Anything you can think of. |
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Posted by edgein17 on 2008-05-26 03:37:31 | Rating: | Views: 815
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that is a hard situation for you... I dont know what to say but dont break up her and her Boy friend my brother made that mistake and it isnt a good idea because now they guy is following my brother around and his ex girlfriend so its a crazy situation my bro is getting like um... threts from this guy telling him that he wants him dead so yeah dont beak her up with her boyfriend
and then there is the other thing would you be ready for it if you and Marie went out?
Would you be ready for your relationship to change... and would you be able to stay in a relationship and are you ok with risking the relationship you have with her right now for a deeper one that might not last...
If you two were to start "dating" and just saying... yall were to break up you are putting your friend ship at risk because you might not be able to stay as good of friends as you were and if you did it would probably become ackward...
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Posted by kitkatbar
on 2008-05-27 11:11:40
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by readin ur blog i feel she might b lookin for smone lik u...her relation with Jay seems souring nd if dey breakup(dont try to break them), u must tell her ur luv..also u knows her better than anybdy...go ahead nd tell her ur will...its all gonna b fine
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Posted by beingme
on 2008-05-27 11:17:29
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Nice story, however, terribly written ;)
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Posted by harriboy
on 2008-05-27 13:30:22
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