I have thought of myself as the passive girl with little potential for a long time now....I have. I have wondered about what the future holds for me. I hear those voices in my mind, taunting me about all the screw ups I've had. I've had those quiet reflections on many things.....
I want a better tomorrow. I want whats best for me....my friends and for the world in general. I am, and always have been a quiet person who thinks of herself with little potential.
I pretend many times to be fine, but the truth is most of the time I'm not and it eats away at me on the inside. I feel pain, remembering what once was, and what is. I come to this computer, feeling a way to escape it all. I worry about the good of people. I cry at night when I think too much.
I am and always have been a quiet person with little or no potential.
I understand my mistakes now and hope I've learned from them. I try to say 'everything will get better', but inside I doubt my words. I dream of a perfect world, one where everyone would be happy, myself included. I try my best to achieve my goals and to be happy. I hope all the evil on this world goes away....
I spent the day today with my best friend in the entire world. I see him only on occasion....times when I begin to drown in my own sadness. He has been my conscience for so long now. He is my Jiminy Cricket.....the angel on my shoulder. Yes, my best friend is a man. Does that surprise you? He and I talk about so many things. We laugh til we snort. He makes me forget all the bad in life and makes me remember the good I have left. He knows me inside and out and tells me what I need to hear and not what I necessarily want to hear. Someone asked me once if I would ever go out romantically with him. Maybe once upon a time....but not now. Our friendship is so much more precious to me now than any romantic tryst. Don't get me wrong.....he's very good looking. But, the bonds we have mean so much more to me and I know he'll be there for me forever. I have seen him through some dark times as he has seen me. He is at my side whenever I need him there and I've found no one else to be exactly like that. He told me today he will dance at my wedding. He is truly the meaning of a best friend and for that I love him dearly.....
Now I know......I am a quiet person and always have been......with so much potential.
Posted by dreampower on 2009-02-23 15:59:55 | Rating: | Views: 225
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