What do you do when you’re told to do nothing?

So they story goes something like this…

There is this gal, a gorgeous, fascinating, mysterious, loving, fun, outgoing, God-fearing gal that I had dated for almost four years. I would say that we had a great relationship. We supported each other, talked w/ each other, cared about each other, respected each other and loved each other. Our relationship was so strong that we were able to spend a year 250 miles apart and actually grow closer to each other. Simply put, we’ve never loved anyone more.

Fast forward to now. We have broken up. Crazy thing is, there was no reason given. She told me one Saturday morning that the Lord told her to break up w/ me. She said she didn’t want to but it was what the Lord had told her to do. I am not against the Lord here, let me make that clear. The Lord speaks to people and I know He is in this break up. To continue, being that she said she didn’t want to, but the Lord did, one would think she would still desire to be near me, right? (someone please answer this!) Well as it turns out, the last thing she wanted for me to talk to her. How that is the Lords will I am not sure. I thought since she said she didn’t want to break up that she would still want to be friends of some significance. I was wrong. She told me over and over again, “I don’t want to talk about it, I don’t want to think about it or you.” Since then she hasn’t called, stopped by, texted, asked a friend about me, emailed, nothing, not a lick of any sort of contact. Four years of drawing close to each other, loving one another, doing nearly everything together and she just tosses it out the window and never looks back.

One might think that this would all be ok and within the Lord’s will for us, but she goes ahead a throws in a screwball. She begins hanging out with the guy, who she adamantly denies to “date.” She says she’s not dating him but actions say another. He drove her, and his friend to the coast for the weekend to meet her friends. They play volleyball every weekend together, shop together, go to dinner with her family together, go to church together and the list carries on in ways I don’t want to know about. I just have one question, what it the Lord’s will or her will to date someone else, especially only 2 weeks after we ended our 4 year relationship?

So, being the confused dumped by the curb guy I asked her sister what I should do.( I asked the gal, but all she said was “I don’t want to talk about it.”) Her sister told me to give her space. Just for the record, that phrase “to give space” is hogwash. I mean what does that mean?(again, someone please answer) So I’ve translated the phrase to mean, don’t talk to her, which I haven’t for nearly a month and half now. Trouble is, I work with her. She doesn’t talk to me and I don’t talk to her. I want to talk to her, but she only gets upset when I talk to her. She talks to everyone in the joint but ignores me when she walks by. I have become an obligation to hear. By having become so, if she were to talk to me she has the feeling that she would have to go out of her way to do something for me. I JUST WANT TO TALK TO THE WOMEN I STILL LOVE! I WANT HER TO KNOW THAT I HAVE GIVEN HER ME, NOTHING LESS. Being so, if she doesn’t want to talk I will not make her talk, nor will I talk to her, for what she wants is what I will respect and honor.

So now that we are on this “not talking” basis what can I do? Should I continue on w/ my life and never look back just as it seems she has done? Everything inside of me does not want to do this. I would lay my life down for her before I just let her walk away, to never look back is not an option for me, but should it be? Should I sit back and wait for her to figure things out and see if I am the one she will want to give her life to just as she is the one I want to give my life to? What to do in silence is what I do not understand. I am afraid if I begin talking to her she will only push away more and thus I remain silent, hoping for some response.  

If you want to drive a person mad, don’t talk to them, especially if you know that person loves you with all their heart.

Peace.