Well, I called it some time ago.

Andy asked Amy for a separation last week.  He came over friday night by my request. I acctually wanted him there to help cheer up Dan who has been unbearable lately.

While we sat he thought nothing of grabbing a beer from the fridge.  He told us about his talk with Amy, Discussed enlisting and had already spoken to his recruiter (again).  Also talked about becoming a volenteer firefighter in his small little town.

I asked him where he planned to stay.  He mention the names of a few friends.  I expressed my worry as they are 24/7 partyers.  He told me nothing to worry about.

I reminded him about the talk we had in December in which he swore to me on his childrens lives he would never drink again. (while pointing to the bottle in his hand)

There were a few more things said, but I kept it short as this evening was about Dan and having fun.  We then went and played "Rock Band" for a couple of hours.

Yesterday  I e-mailed him and told him I was sorry for being so "Pushy"  and that I had a few more thoughts for him, but only if he wanted to hear them.

I have not heard anything from him since then. no texts, calls, e-mails.  It will be interesting to see if he shows up tonight for league.

Since the very Day I met him, it has almost been as if I feel him inside me.  Every laugh every heart break.  Right now I have to keep myself occupied as I want desperatly to cry. My chest aches and I feel a desperation.

For what.  I have nothing to lose or gain.
I know this, But it doesn't change the sick feeling I have inside, when he is hurting.

Truly his pain is killing me.