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| Part II of Learning to love unconditionally
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Is it love, Sex or fear?
Sometimes, the only way to resolve a friendship or relationship problem is to bring it to an end. When we are in a friendship or relationship, we tend to have an expectation of mutual appreciation, acknowledgment and love expressions. That is the way a normal friendship is supposed to be right? Yes, that’s how it is supposed to be. But a true friendship does not have any suppositions or expectations of what the friendship should be like. True friendship can exist even when the parties are not normal friends.
What happens when the relationship or friendship with the person has ended in the normal sense? There is no longer an expectation or need for that person to give you acknowledgment, appreciation or anything for that matter. The same goes for you as well. You no longer need to give that person anything at all. But now you are in a space where if you feel love, appreciation and kindness for that person, you can still give it if you wish. You can now give out of a heart that is totally free and unconditional.
That is the irony of a true friendship that exists without a friendship in the normal sense of the word. You can’t feel unappreciated when you do not need appreciation. You can’t feel unacknowledged when you do not need acknowledgement. You can’t be mistreated when you do not need the person to treat you in a certain way. Most of all, you can’t be hurt when there’s nothing the person can do to make you feel hurt. Because now that person can’t take anything from you or give you what you already have.
When you feel true love for another, the love you have is not your own, but it is God expressing through you. You may feel anger, hurt and resentment because of your expectation of how that person should treat you. But when all those expectations and requirements are gone, what is left is the pure unconditional love that is always present beneath it all. Everything else is just meant for you to discover where you are being conditional and limited in your heart. But when you let go, you can love totally.
You don’t need to end the friendship or relationship in the literal sense, but you just need to imagine what’s it like being a true friend or being loved when the friendship or relationship isn’t required. True love is free without needing anything in return. To truly love is to love unconditionally, without judgment of that which you love. There is no fear in perfect love. Whoever that fears is not yet made perfect in love. When you love perfectly, you do not judge yourself or the other because you accept both completely.
Love yourself for all that you are because you are worth it. From the place of complete self love and self acceptance, you are able to love another with an unconditional heart. Because you do not need anything back. Therefore you can’t be hurt at all. You can love without fear. Remember the saying, “Work like you don’t need the money, dance like no one’s watching and love like you’ve never been hurt before”. Love like you’ve never been hurt before. It is the pure, fearless and unconditional giving of yourself.
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Posted by davistheblackeagle on 2008-02-09 09:18:03 | Rating: | Views: 105
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| Blog Comments
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That was so well put, and completely correct in my opinion. It's very hard to love like you have never been hurt. Is it possible to love someone like that who has hurt you, or that you have hurt?
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Posted by BitterSweetNy
on 2008-02-14 22:21:02
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