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| A Man's Insight into Dating |
Went out with Rocket Scientist on Thursday. I figured this date would decide whether we were heading down the friendship or romantic path. Friends it is!
He was still as cute as I remembered and we still had good rapport. But in the end, he simply wasn't Crafty. Nevertheless, Rocket Scientist and I had a great time. For some reason (maybe because we are both science nerds at heart) we were able to break down alot of the gender mysteries about dating. For example, he broke down my situation with Frat Boy very elegantly. If a man has alot of friends, then a girl he meets has to be able to provide him with something his other friends do not (other than just sex). If not, then there is no reason for him to pursue a relationship that can potentially get messy, when his needs are more simply met by his friends. Rocket Scientist basically said it comes down to cost/benefit analysis. It sounded cold to me at the time, but the more I think about it, the more I realize he is right. When it comes to men, their view of things are very simple. Women tend to bring so many more factors into it--past, future, other relationships, fears, fantasies. Which is maybe why someone, say an attractive asian blogger, could fall for someone complex, dark and so clearly bad for her on paper.
Rocket Scientist also told me that he has an interesting rule. If the woman does not kiss him on the lips on the first date, he doesn't call her again. He says those last five minutes in the car with her have more truth in it than the entire night. Which is funny, because I did not let him kiss me on the mouth on our first date. Maybe that's why we headed down the friendship road. He also says that he continues to date a woman as long as things progress physically. But the moment that it stops progressing (assuming they have not yet slept together) he stops seeing her. This is not your run of the mill lothario. He's no player--he's rocket scientist, remember? So the fact that he says this makes me wonder if this is true for all single men in their 30's.
I, in turn, told him how I almost always managed to get asked out on a second date--a rarity, so he says. Having not dated much, I didn't know this. But I tell him, I show up looking nice, I ask them plenty of questions about themselves, only share a few funny anecdotes about me and give them a non-comittal hug when I say goodbye. (Except of course for the ones I really like. I did a hell of a lot more than hug Crafty on our first date.) Guys love two things--talking about themselves and a good chase. It sounds like I don't like men, but I do. Truly, I do. Sometimes, I just don't like their motives.
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Posted by datingretard on 2008-02-02 22:10:39 | Rating: | Views: 179
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