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| What does it mean to be a man? |
That's a question I sometimes ponder, being that I don't fit the stereotype of your standard male. I don't watch sports, I don't act tough, I don't try to pick fights with people, and I'm ultra-concerned about the way my hair looks. I'm probably one of the few heterosexual males who gets his hair done at beauty parlors--we're talking highlights and everything. My point of view is that (as a guy) I might not be able to hold onto my hair very long, so I may as well take advantage of it while I'm still in my 20's. I don't understand all these young guys who get their heads shaved and get crew-cuts and all that shit. What's gonna happen 20 years from now when you're looking back at pictures from your youth? "Hey, look at me. I looked...exactly the same." I'm glad that I'm so meticulous with my hair. Women notice it...and seem quite pleased with it.
I sometimes think that, subconsciously, one of the minor reasons why I liked frequenting strip clubs for a long time was that it gave me heterosexual street cred. It screams out, Yes people! I do like chicks! I could "maybe" understand a guy, who's in the closet, going to strip clubs to prove to his guy friends that he's straight. But I wouldn't often go with my guy friends. I'd go alone! There are plenty of gay men who have girlfriends, or are even married and have kids. But a gay man would not frequent strip clubs. I mean, you're already putting your dignity on the line by saying, "Hey I'm a pervert who's paying to watch chicks shake their asses and boobies in my face." Why would you do that if you were gay?
Besides, I've been to strip clubs where the guys pay more attention to the football game than the girls. That, I think, shows the contradiction of men thinking it's "gay" not to watch sports. You have all this nude or semi-nude female flesh on stage, and you'd rather watch a bunch of big, sweaty guys tackling each other on the field? Who's gay now? Now, if your eyes are on the screen because the cheerleaders are doing their routine--I can fully understand. Hell, even my eyes drift towards the screen during those moments.
Despite how it sounds, I have nothing against sports fans. I just have something against watching sports as a declaration of heterosexuality. I just don't see the fun in watching sports. Why the fuck should I care if this team wins? I don't know anybody on the fucking team. I'm supposed to cheer for them, because they play for the city or state in which I reside? That's not enough reason for me. Plus, you have to understand that I wasn't raised in a sports-loving household. My dad couldn't care less about sports, and the same goes with my mom. I didn't live in one of those households where the dad is glued to his recliner, ordering his kids to cheer for the Jets or he's gonna write them out his will. Yeah, I know some of you are laughing, because you have one of those dads. Though I don't play sports either, I can see the fun in that. But watching it? Come on. And I can't help but roll my eyes and scoff when I hear some 400-pound fat fuck criticizing a team for not playing to the best of their abilities. Let's see your fat ass on the field! That is if you can put down the nachos for one second.
I don't often receive accusations that I'm gay, but I know how people think. I know how they think when they see a handsome, clean-shaven dude with long hair and blonde highlights. Well, as I like to put it, I'm "sickeningly heterosexual." I not only love women, but am also addicted to porn and used to be heavily addicted to strippers and phone sex. If I was addicted to prostitutes as well, I'd say I'm a regular Charlie Sheen.
I love being a guy and never do I have wishes of being female. But I always feel that the downside of being a guy is constantly feeling obligated to defend your sexuality. After all these years, there are still plenty of men who act like fucking cavemen. Not many advances have occurred within the male gender. Women, however, have advanced greatly. I know several women are tomboys or simply enjoy male hobbies. I don't see women whispering under their breaths, "You know she's a fucking dyke." If I as much as admit that I like Madonna (and I am, in fact, a big fan), guys would chastise me.
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