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| Day 1...again...ABC... |
I am feeling pretty stupid right now. I should have come on here first thing to get my inspiration for the day. But I didnt. And then I went to the shops...
I am too ashamed to even write down what I bought. I bought it with the intention of binging on it and then just purging it all. Which I did.
This is not where I want to be!!!
I am supposed to be eating only enough so that I dont feel like I have to purge it. This ana-boot-camp thing is the perfect amount of calories for me at the moment. I dont want to have to purge. I want to get out of the habit of it. I am sick of lying to my husband when he asks if I'm still doing it. ITS MAKING ME MISERABLE!!!!!
I was doing so well up until Friday night when we were at my nieces house having beers and playing poker. Someone brought out some chocolate. I had 1/2 a mint stick thingy and then I couldnt stop eating the chocolate. I felt so bad about that on Saturday morning but instead of going to the gym that morning and working it off and then not eating for the rest of the day to make up for it I just ate more shit. It was like I just gave up. Its so pathetic. Oh and I didnt go to the gym.
I am definatly going to the gym tonight. I have to. I am looking down at my stomach at the moment and it is DEFINATLY poking out more than the other day. NOT HAPPY JAN!!!
On a lighter note, I am 2kgs down even after my weekend binge so I'm a bit happy about that. Would love to have known what I weighed on Friday. I am going to start weighing every day again. I cant hang out 7 days. I cant give up ALL my habits at once can I...haha...
Oh and on another not happy note, its only something like 9 weeks until I go to Tas. SHIIIIIIT! At last I dont have to dance anymore. NO PRESSURE.
So gym tonight, lax tonight, 500 calories tomorrow!!
Hope everyone else is doing better!!!!!
xoxoxoxo chubbymummy xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Posted by chubbymummy on 2009-11-01 23:23:01 | Rating: | Views: 43
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