| chebtastic1's Blog Comments |
| Posted in
What's wrong with a little Quiet? on 2008-03-31 19:25:11 |
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I know what you mean....my mum has her tv on whenever she is in the house - shes not watching it and i say, why have it on if you're not watching it, but she likes it in the backgroud. She says its too quiet otherwise. To me theres no such thing.
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| Posted in
Chebtastic1 on 2008-03-31 18:40:25 |
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aaaawwwwwwwweeeeeee...lol
Thank you darling...bless you made me blush again! I'm glad you're here...you do feel closer now. Guess what? I love ya too. xxx
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| Posted in
Powerful women and Sex on 2008-03-31 18:06:11 |
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The same thing happened between me and my husband. It just...fizzled out. Things were always bad or okay, never great. Neither of us was ever totally happy.
It wasnt that I stopped loving him, but like trevorjohn said, I just stopped being IN love...in fact, I dont think I was to begin with.
I wish I had had your courage...I started a relationship before my marriage officially ended (in every other way it had been over for a long time) for the simple reason I didnt have the courage to come out and say it was over, I'm leaving you. It took me ages to do that, and the releif when I did was massive.
I am fortunate that my husband quickly accepted that I was right and it was a relief to us both when it ended, but it was still tough. What I did to him wasnt fair, even though its worked out for the best for both of us.
Sometimes things just dont work out. I know I am with the right person now.
I hope whatever you chose to do and whenever you do it, you find happiness.
Peace x cheb x
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| Posted in
I would like to thank the academy... on 2008-03-31 15:24:23 |
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Oh wow...and I know you...you're on my friends list...finally - a claim to fame. Yaayyyy!!! Lol x Congrats x hehe x
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| Posted in
I Am Fat. on 2008-03-31 12:51:51 |
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I'm a big girl too, I'm nearly 27 years old and I always have been. Let me tell you, it used to bother me immensely in my teenage years but not as I've gotten older. I'm very happy as I am now.
The terms 'fat' and 'ugly' do not belong together...what is ugly, is not carrying a little extra flesh, but saying hurtful things, being spiteful and being superficial.
Love yourself, as you are. I dont know what you look like, but I know you are beautiful...just by your words.
I am genuinely happy as I am. I'd like to lose a little weight, but I'd never want to be skinny if being skinny means having an attitude problem.
Be happy and as I say, love yourself. The confidence you gain as a result will radiate from you and attract decent people to you, people who will love you for who you are, as a whole.
Take care xxx cheb xxx
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| Posted in
Childish or kid at heart? on 2008-03-31 10:20:49 |
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Hey...you're just a kid at heart and thats never a bad thing! Too many people lose that. Its my birthday in a couple of weeks and I'm already excited even though I'm 27! Who says they have to stop being fun, or a big deal, just because you're not ten anymore? The best birthday I ever had was last year, I had the most fun on a birthday ever. Just enjoy it how you want to...and even if it is more a case of being childish...wheres the harm? xxx have fun xxx
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| Posted in
What are you known as? on 2008-03-31 09:32:21 |
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At school I was known as Chunk (a female version of the Goonies character) as a result of me being on the porky side...for a while recently I was 'she who left her husband'...I used to be the blonde girl, just before New Years I died my hair black/red but I am still 'blonde' inside (I have my moments)...I've always been known in my family as the smart one, the funny one (my sister was the pretty one but give me smart and funny over that any day)...same to my friends...now I guess I'm mum-to-be, still the smart one (first in family to go to Uni dontcha know...all together now oooohhhh!!!)...forgetful, ditsy, and maybe a little naive at times. Heart is in the right place...brain...not so much.
Put simply, I'm a prat...but a nice prat. Lol x
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| Posted in
My weekend.... on 2008-03-30 17:29:16 |
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I think you feel the need to tell people because you are seeking validation for the decisions you have already made and the ones you are going to make. I think its good to get as many opinions as you feel you need to, and to talk if you need to, but at the end of the day only you know how you feel and what you think.
Personally I think that you know whats right for you, and your wife, and KP for that matter, and correct me if I am wrong, but I think its more a case of when, rather than if, you end your marriage now. I hope you dont mind me saying that.
I also wanted to throw a thought out there for you...I know on many occasions you have said how frustrating you find your wife's attitude to certain things, as though you feel she is somehow incomplete, stopping short of her potential etc...have you considered that the issue might not be that there's something wrong with her...but rather that she is just wrong for you...and maybe has been from the start? I think you are simply incompatible, maybe you always were.
Hope I havent over stepped the mark, just observations I have made from following your story and going through somthing similar myself.
Take care mate x
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| Posted in
New Profile Photo on 2008-03-30 11:35:12 |
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Incidentally Im not still in the womb...thats my baby...hehe x
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| Posted in
New Profile Photo on 2008-03-30 11:34:14 |
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I want an orange phone!! Mine is Vodaphone, hehe. Jeez that was a crap 'joke'...apologies. Anyways, welcome...look forward to finding out more about you.
Be happy also xxx
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| Posted in
Boycott the Olympics on 2008-03-30 11:11:01 |
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I completely agree with everything you said...I think we should, as a responsible nation, absolutely be boycotting the Olympics. Some things (like humanity and decency) are more important than hopping, skipping and jumping.
George Bush made a claim once that he wanted to rid the world of dictators and evil regimes...yet as you say, nothing is done re China/Tibet and nothing is done about Robert Mugabe either. Our government is just as bad.
Anyone who believes the so-called 'war on terror' is about anything other than money and oil is dillusional and anyone who supports the Olympic games in China is, in my opinion, saying its ok to murder people. The Chinese government needs to be stopped and shamed for what they are.
A fabulous post, highlighting what is to me, a very important issue.
Thank you x
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| Posted in
45 - part 2,,,what I want to be when I grow up on 2008-03-28 20:29:16 |
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Hmm...kangaroo hearding...not sure about that one. Maybes you could be the next Crocodile Dundee?? Just a thought....hehe x
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| Posted in
He's not getting killed, he's getting mad on 2008-03-28 15:42:18 |
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At least when all is said and done, you will be able to say you tried re your marriage. No one will be able to say you didnt try.
And try not to have regrets...things happen (or not) at the right time and you and KP will have your 'right time' xxx
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| Posted in
Who plays you? on 2008-03-28 15:38:41 |
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My darling mother just pointed out that Renee Zelweger would be great playing me - with the arse of Bridget Jones (and her pants)...and a bit (hmm) more meat besides...lol x
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| Posted in
Who plays you? on 2008-03-28 15:34:23 |
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Dunno if you guys will have heard of her, but I'd be played by British commedienne Dawn French - big lady like myself. David would be the late, great, John Candy...a gentle giant. Hehe x
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| Posted in
A Heartfelt Thank You on 2008-03-28 11:15:07 |
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Bullseye - thank you, that means alot! :-)
Mysticmoon - I've been fascinated by theories like yours. Always considered myself an athiest, but I guess in my own odd little way I'm kinda spiritual...I seem to make it up as I go along!
I believe in fate and signs and people leaving a little part of themselves behind.
I have had several dreams of my dad since he died that have been more than just a dream - where I have physically felt him and talked to him, often at times when I've been going through troubles. This one just freaked me because its been a long time since I've thought of him with such grief - not that I'm over him dying, just that I've moved on from the initial raw grief, I had to for my own sanity.
The dream brought back the feelings I had right after I lost him and made me realise how much I miss him and wish he were here for this special time in my life.
One thing I am glad for...not a day went past when I didnt tell him I loved him, or hear him say it to me. So I have no regrets, no if onlys - I know he loved me and he knows I loved (love) him. That brings immense peace and comfort.
Thanks for stopping by xxx
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| Posted in
Dieting on 2008-03-28 10:52:44 |
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Thats my major downfall - I dont like fruit. Its not the flavour, its the texture its...yuck! Hehe x Luckily, I love my veggies. Chocolate is my downfall....sigh...looking forward to summer, cause I go right off it when its hot weather. Enjoy! :-) xxx
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| Posted in
fool me once, shame on u ???? on 2008-03-28 08:51:46 |
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I meant i dont believe in God, therefore I dont believe in the devil either...sorry! x
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| Posted in
fool me once, shame on u ???? on 2008-03-28 08:51:08 |
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another great post. My trouble is I dont believe in any God, therefore I dont believe in evil either. I believe good and bad live within people, not an external entity. So I guess I would chose to serve myself!
Whether religion were to unite in one 'super religion' or remain seperate as they are now, religion is still about one thing - control, in my opinion. That will never change. I also feel that many of the problems this world we live in are a direct result of religion, so I could never see it as a good thing.
Thanks for making me think as ever
Kind regards
Cheb x
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| Posted in
Dieting on 2008-03-27 20:56:06 |
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Congrats! Never been a fan of diets myself, I have come to love myself as I am...but the important thing is that you're happy.
My advice for dieting is always dont...in that I dont think dieting works unless you can keep up the changes for life. I could go on a diet and lose weight for sure (maybe not now with the baby!) but I wouldnt be able to keep the weight off. Eat the food you love, dont eat less, just eat more healthy stuff.
My sister is well into dieting and she made a good suggestion (she saw it on some tv programme but I reckon its a good idea). Chew your food ten times before you swallow it, eat off smaller plates, and stop when you're full, even if there's food left on your plate. Also, dont eat after 6pm as anything eaten after this wont be burnt off.
Then of course theres the old chestnut of never missing breakfast.
Above all, dont make food an enemy, enjoy it!
Well done you and good luck! xxx
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| Posted in
What is going on? on 2008-03-27 20:48:07 |
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foxx_flie...I second that sentiment. And KP, you are right on the money. Theres alot of unneccessary cruelty, bigotry and down right arrogance going around and decent people are suffering at the hands of people who do not know them. Often people who are vulnerable too. There's a definite air of negativity, and I found myself getting wound up and drawn into such a blog just today, where normally I would not get involved.
I wish people would just think before they post. Presenting an opinion is one thing...presenting that opinion as fact is something else entirely.
Great post, well said.
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| Posted in
Her on 2008-03-27 20:11:01 |
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What a beautiful post...my heart absolutely aches for you hunny...I cant imagine what you go through on a day to day basis. When you love someone the most mundane of things becomes magical. Be well and be happy xxx
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| Posted in
Mamacita925 on 2008-03-27 19:46:44 |
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I am fat, have always been fat and always will be fat. Why? because I am comfortable with how I am. I'm not unhealthy, I can climb stairs, I don't have diabetes, heart problems, I can do what I need to in life.
I dont want to get in the middle of an arguement (because I have enough in my own life to deal with, and its more important than this) but I just had to say something.
You got all worked up about Mamacita calling you a bitch...and then at the end of your post...called yourself a bitch? Am I the only one can see the contraditction there? If you are entitled to insult people, she is entitled to you. its called free speach.
And again without wanting to get in the middle (but using my right to free speach)...I would rather be fat than be a bitch ANY DAY.
I win.
Sorry. Needed saying. Say no more...
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| Posted in
45 years PART 1(this rambles i warn you) on 2008-03-27 19:14:36 |
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You dated Lucy from peanuts...I married Pig Pen! Just remember...every cloud...sigh...hehe
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| Posted in
Introduction on 2008-03-27 12:18:38 |
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Welcome to thoughts.com. I hope you find many friends here. And if you like...I'll be the first x
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| Posted in
Danny's Song on 2008-03-27 12:16:37 |
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You're right...thats a beautiful song. xxx
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| Posted in
OK line forms on the right please on 2008-03-27 08:20:35 |
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Wow...right on the money as usual. I am very fortunate that my man has your mindset, not only making sure I'm satisfied too, but making sure I'm satisfied first! He once made me climax without even touching me (and believe me, neiher me, nor he knew that was even possible!), just with words. Now thats chemistry!
You're right, it is common sense...my husband used to be frusrated that I wasn't interested in sex, but that was only because it did nothing for me, or rather he did nothing for me...it never even crossed his mind.
I dont think sex is a vital part of a relationship, but it is important - without sexual compatability, problems occur.
Another great post xxx
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| Posted in
HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaaaaaa on 2008-03-27 07:38:03 |
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hehehehehehe xxx nice one xxxx
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| Posted in
SHAME ON SOCIETY! on 2008-03-26 19:50:46 |
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I too know who you mean and totally agree with every word you said...well put! Shame on them indeed.
You're a good friend.xxx
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| Posted in
Dream #1 on 2008-03-26 18:55:00 |
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I can relate to that...I've had many dreams of my dad, who I miss greatly. Read my most recent blog, you'll see what I mean. Dreams are really quite amazing, and I tend to remember most of mine...I can even remember some from my childhood.
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| Posted in
HEY on 2008-03-26 18:50:06 |
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Hey! lol x
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| Posted in
Who Was Your First Crush? on 2008-03-26 18:44:53 |
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I think he probably is a 'national treasure'...unfortunately I can only picture him on roller skates in the video for the aforementioned 'Wired For Sound' (thanks for that Easytosay!).
Another flashback that has me roaring with laughter...
Thanks for making me smile xxx
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| Posted in
ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST! on 2008-03-26 18:41:14 |
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Oh my God...I'm so sorry for whats been said/done by some thoughtless arsehole! I second Bulleyes sentiment. You're a wonderful person and never let anyone tell you different. If you need time to yourself, to get strong and then come back and kick butt, or if you never come back to thoughts.com...or whatever...I wish for you only the very best life has to offer. You have decency and courage of the likes most can only dream of possessing, and I feel lucky to have met you and felt inspired by you.
Get away for a while, take a breath and have some 'you' time. God knows...you've earned it xxx
Lots of love and hugs xxxxx cheb xxxxx
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| Posted in
Who Was Your First Crush? on 2008-03-26 17:57:13 |
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My mum had a Cliff Richard calendar when we were little and kept it up way after the twelve months were up! Mind, it was better than the dude she had before on the wall...his name was Alvin Stardust, and to this day I have no idea who he was, but his name still has me in hysterics (I think he was a singer at some point??).
My first crush was Robbie Williams, a la Take That fame...swoon.... xxx
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| Posted in
all men cheat on 2008-03-26 17:52:59 |
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Dont judge all men by your standards. SOME men cheat...and SOME women cheat...thats the way of the world...but its nowhere near as simple as you seem to think.
Have you met all men? Just a thought
;-) xx
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| Posted in
Maybe a study worth the money, maybe on 2008-03-26 12:48:37 |
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My husband always said no other man would want me. So I guess thats why the marriage failed then? Cause he felt he was doing me a favour, being with me (gee thanks). Now I dont think I'm attractive at all, I think I'm kinda normal, but David thinks I am gorgeous and wonderful and thats all that matters. The best thing of all is we can hold a conversation, debate for hours and we both love that.
I reckon there's something in it - not that the woman needs to be more attractive, but that the man needs to feel a little like he has to put some effort in. Same goes for the woman I guess. Great post xxx
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| Posted in
uggggggggggggghhhh. on 2008-03-26 09:31:52 |
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I have been exactly where you are hun, many many times, and so I can sympathise, although that won't help you to feel any better. I used to look at mums and their babies and cry, wondering how it could be so easy for them and wondering what I had to do to have me one of those.
I know its hard (believe me, I know), but I think the best way to concieve is to let go...try not to obsess, as the stress of trying can often prevent you getting pregnant. If you are under 25 and its been over 6 months, I'd say go and see a docor in case there's something else preventing you from concieving. Nine times out of ten if there is, there are things that can be done, modern medicine has made some wonderful advances.
I'd say...DO give up. Stop trying for a baby and it will happen when you least expect it.
I don't believe in God, but I do believe in fate, and I believe some people are destined to be parents. I believe that includes you. Hang in there. xxx thinking of you xxx
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| Posted in
Driver Sues Dead Victim's Family For Car Damages on 2008-03-26 07:07:23 |
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Oh my God...thats disgraceful. Some people have no shame xxx
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| Posted in
More than just a Blog on 2008-03-25 19:26:42 |
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When I first joined thoughts.com, with what I was going through at the time, I feared criticism and condemnation...but Bullseye was the first person to ever comment on one of my blogs and he did so with kindness. I will miss him too, but as has been said...I respect that he needs some time for himself and wish him all the best xxx
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| Posted in
Welcome on 2008-03-25 19:19:46 |
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Hi...welcome to thoughts.com xxx
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| Posted in
What you want out of life? on 2008-03-25 19:14:10 |
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I am beginning to believe more and more that the problem is very simple and maybe you're frustrated because you're over analysing something thats actually quite straight forward (albeit sad)...you and your wife just want different things.
The common ground that you started married life with is just...dwindling. While you're wondering why she doesnt want more...she's wondering why what you have isn't enough for you. Doesn't mean either of you are wrong, just your viewpoint has changed.
I always liked the quote...'love is not gazing into each others eyes, it is looking forward in the same direction'...I think you and your wife are looking ahead in different directions.
I know this sounds selfish, but there are times in our lives we just have to do things for ourselves. Seeing places and people, growing and learning...thats what I chose to do when I went back to college. And I wanted to take my husband along for the ride, but in the end I had to resolve myself to the fact that I couldnt force him, and I had to move forward anyway, for ME.
I hope you find some peace from all this soon, for the sakes of everyone involved and wish you the best as ever.
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| Posted in
Love. on 2008-03-25 19:00:12 |
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I second that! xxx :-) xxx
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| Posted in
MADE A PHONE CALL FINALLY! on 2008-03-24 12:52:41 |
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I cant tell you how proud I am of you right now! I also just wanyed to say that how you feel about yourself right now, is not how you will always feel...because its how he makes you feel. Over time, and with the love of people who really, genuinely love you, you will find the old you again, or maybe even a better version of the old you. I am thinking of you, and rooting for you and I think I speak for everyone here when I say...good luck and well done!! Big smiles and a round of heartfelt applause!! xxxxxxxxx
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| Posted in
Day 5 post op on 2008-03-23 19:34:01 |
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Wishing you a speedy recovery xxxx :-) xxxx
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| Posted in
Who said I was rationale???? on 2008-03-23 08:13:24 |
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I know exactly what you mean. Right before me and hubby split, we had our last arguement I guess - well, the last one where we sort of made up. He wanted a hug and he clung to me, but I felt nothing. Even though I knew before then I was gonna leave, it was still a really sad moment for me...the moment I properly realised that after 7 years...I felt nothing for this man anymore. It does hurt.
Incidentally...the song you posted was beautiful - what's it called and who's it by?
Hang in there...all will be okay, one way or another xxx
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| Posted in
SMITTEN LIKE A KITTEN! AND IT FEELS SO GOOD! on 2008-03-22 15:50:03 |
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Believe me hun...I know EXACTLY what you mean. Aint it great? Hehe xxx smiles and hugs xxx
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| Posted in
What is Karma? on 2008-03-22 11:29:44 |
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I tend to be guilty of using the term alot but was unsure if I was using it in the right context. For example, if someone does something deliberatly bad, I will say 'Oh, karma will get to them in the end' a sort of 'they'll get theirs' kinda thing. I found your post very interesting, I think alot such as this is misunderstood or misinterpreted. Peace xxx
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| Posted in
Finding Mr. Right on 2008-03-22 06:23:48 |
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I have a theory that you dont find true love - IT finds YOU. So there's no point to looking for it, let it come to you. And it will, when the time is right, everyone has a perfect partner after all...hang in there xxx :-) xxx
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| Posted in
BRITISH SUMMERTIME....A HAHAHAHAHAHA.... on 2008-03-22 05:34:10 |
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Thats 19 days til I go to Newcastle, lol xxx :-) xxx
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| Posted in
Give Me My Computer or Give Me Death! on 2008-03-22 05:17:24 |
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I know what you mean...I have my computor to thank for so much, and it is such a lifeline, that i din't know what i'd do without it. Sad? I don't think so...just a mark of the times we now live in.
Nice to have you back, hope all is well xxx
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| Posted in
SMITTEN LIKE A KITTEN! AND IT FEELS SO GOOD! on 2008-03-22 05:14:21 |
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It's right...how could it be anything else? :-) be happy xxx
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| Posted in
Love. on 2008-03-21 10:46:15 |
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What can I say? Loved it xxx
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| Posted in
2 on 2008-03-20 22:00:35 |
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) Ever been to a strip club?
no
2) Ever been to a bar?
erm...safe to say, yes
3) Ever been so drunk you had to be carried out of somewhere?
no, but I was thrown out of a pub on my 18th for up-chucking on the steps to the entrance (ahh happy days)
4) kissed someone of the same sex?
yes
5) thrown up from drinking too much?
yes - see above. and once out with my sister and mum...apparently all I kept saying to the barmaid ( i was sitting outside a pub in the beer garden) was 'get me a mop, i'll clean it up!'
6) had sex in a car?
yes
7) had sex in a park?
no
8) had sex in a movie theater?
no
9) had sex in a bathroom?
yes
10) had sex at work?
nope
11) Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
no
12) Bought something from an adult store?
no
13) Have you spent over $100.00 in one visit to the adult store?
no
14) Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
no
15) have you ever had a threesome?
yes
16) Are your breasts real?
yes
17) Have you ever kissed a stranger?
no
18) Does anyone have naughty pics of you?
oh yes
19) What is the shortest period of time between meeting someone and having sex with them?
3 days
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| Posted in
Days go by... on 2008-03-20 21:10:16 |
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Roll on moving day, huh? Won't be long now...
I have my fingers crossed for you on the job and the baby issue...I still have a feeling things are coming good for you. New beginnings in every sense.
Wishing you all your heart desires. Peace and love xxx
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| Posted in
Stars and Bars on 2008-03-20 19:48:11 |
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I had to look up what the confederate flag was I have to admit but I can see why you were stunned. I recently blogged about the St Paddy's day fuss over here in England and how we go nuts over it, but then ignore our own patron saints day, St Georges day in April. It seems that over here we only fly the St Georges cross during sporting events and even that has only been the last ten years or so. Having looked into it a bit I can sorta see why people are maybe a little reluctant to fly it - in the 80's it had connections with various race hate groups, most notably the BNP (British Nationalist Party) and C18 (our version of the KKK). To some it is still a symbol of racism which is a shame cause its the English national flag. For me, I would prefer to fly the British flag, because thats what I identify with for some reason, but I guess its a matter of something meaning different things to different people.
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| Posted in
Would you EVER cheat on your spouse? on 2008-03-20 13:26:48 |
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I did. I took a risk and went for what my heart wanted. I left my husband after seeing another man for over a year (m marriage was alredy over, we had become like lodgers living together) and now me and my new man are gonna be living together and are having a baby in the summer.
I have no regrets, only that I should have left my marriage sooner.
At the end of the day you have to listen to your heart.
Everyone starts married life with the best of intentions, but sometimes things just dont work out how you thought they would. Things change, people change. Everyones situation is different.
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| Posted in
The 1 4 Me on 2008-03-20 13:18:31 |
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I agree whiteknight. The heart is to me even more powerful than the mind. The mind, at least, we can control but the heart...if we listen to it, we have no control over it. But you know what? It's almost never wrong.
What society sees as right and wrong is always changing, and what is it anyway, but an opinion? I for one would rather be happy in my life than follow my head and be miserable.
Some will say I hurt my husband deeply when I left him for another man, and yes, I'm sure I did. But also...if he's not right for me, then I am not right for him either. How could either of us ever have been completely happy?
No man or woman can be lured away that doesnt want to leave, and if we live our lives concerned by what other people think, then we may miss our chance for true happiness, and either way...someone will be pissed off, so you might as well just do what feels right. As long as its between two consenting adults, and isnt done with the deliberate intention of hurting someone...you are only answerable to yourselves.
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| Posted in
MAN, DID I PISS OFF THIS COMPUTER!! on 2008-03-20 13:07:01 |
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Yep, mine buggered up for a bit too last night. It was about 11 here so I guess about 5ish in the States. I sat looking at it for a couple of minutes thinking 'what did I do?' and then just went to bed. Kinda makes you think though...if our computors were actual living entities...what they would think about us...hmmm...best not go there... :-) xxx
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| Posted in
WHAT THE FU_ _ DID YOU JUST SAY????????? on 2008-03-20 09:00:23 |
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OMG!!! Was he taking the piss or what?? I like to hear the new (or is it the old - in the nicest possible sense of the word) you! I used to be told, why couldnt you just let it go, why did you have to argue back, it would have been ok if you'd just kept quiet, but I just thought...why the hell should I? I have my own voice and don't need anyone to talk for me, or silence me. Everyone used to say they missed the old me, but no one missed her more than me. Now she's on her way back, I feel so much happier.
Can't tell you how proud I am of you xxx
hope TS is doing well! xxx
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| Posted in
Hell on 2008-03-20 08:55:18 |
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you also made my 'day'...oops x ;-)
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| Posted in
Hell on 2008-03-20 08:54:39 |
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hahahahahahahahahahaha xxxx made my dasy as ever, thanks Wayne! xxx :-)
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| Posted in
Month One: Total Disbelief on 2008-03-19 17:22:35 |
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What a beautiful, heart wrenching post. My dad passed away seven years ago last week, but I still have no idea how you are feeling. My father died suddenly and without any drama. We had no idea he was going to die. He was 55 and just...went to sleep, never to wake up.
There is something very profound, very special, about the bond between a father and his daughter, a bond that is totally unbreakable.
I wish I could think of something to say to help you through this. I was told that time is a healer. Well I will be honest and tell you that after seven years I am not over it...time doesnt stop the pain, I have simply managed somehow to find a way to live with it. I know that as long as I remember and honour him, he will never die.
I was given many verses when my father passed, by very kind people. I was finding it especially hard because I was the one who found his body and we were so very close.
I hope in some way they might help you, even if its just a little bit.
"Death is nothing at all. It does not count. I have only slipped away into another room. I am I, and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by my familiar name, speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference in your tone, wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we shared together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name ever be the household word it always was. Let it be spoken without effort, without the ghost of a shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant. There is absolute unbroken continuety. What is death but a negligible accident? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner. All is well."
- Henry Scott Holland.
"When I am gone, release me, let me go
I have so many thngs to see and do
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears
But let my spirit calm your fears
I gave you my love, you can only guess
How much you gave me in happiness!
I thank you for the love that you have shown
But now its time that I travelled on alone
So grieve awhile for me, if grieve you must
Then let your grief be comforted by trust
Its only for a while that we must part
So bless the memories that lie in your heart
I won't be far away, for life goes on
Though you can't see or touch me, I will be there, you must be strong
And if you listen with all your heart, you will hear
All my love surrounding you, soft and clear
And then when you must come this way
I'll greet you with a smile and say...
'WELCOME HOME'
There are a couple more, 'The Ship' and 'Remember Me' I wrote as blogs if you want to look them up.
I am thinking of you. Remember the greatest tribute you can give your dad is to remember him and carry on with your life, taking him with you.
I wish you, and your family, peace.
'If you met him, you loved him
If you knew him you were blessed
If he loved you, you are honoured
cause you were loved by the very best...'
xxxxxxx
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JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THE STORM WAS OVER............ on 2008-03-19 15:51:06 |
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I'd donate! Excellent idea! Hang in there xxxxx
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Not Ready for Primetime Superpower on 2008-03-19 15:49:51 |
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The idea of living in China scares me. In Nottingham there are alot of Chinese students. They come here because the education opportunities are better.
From the conversations I've had with Chinese students it is an incredibly oppressive regime, but people haven't noticed that because it is also a very rich nation. They have a policy of one child per household, and a few years ago there were pictures in the news of foetuses dumped in the gutter - literally. Dead babies just flung in the street like rubbish. You only have to look at whats going on with Tibet to see what their governments think of Human Rights. Freedom of speech, for a start, is non exisitant. The students I have talked to have told me even access to the internet is restricted, sites like myspace, wikepdia and new sites. Its probably the one country in the world I have no desire to visit (Iraq might be on that list also!).
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I've been bleeding...and I'm scared for my baby... on 2008-03-19 10:55:23 |
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Thanks Bullseye...I know I am probably being kinda paranoid and unreasonable but this is not my first pregancy and yet I have no kids...so thats why. I appreciate you stopping by. I am beginning to calm down a little now xxx :-) xxx
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Walk to happiness on 2008-03-19 10:17:03 |
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I always had a thing for wanting to go to New York. I felt drawn to the name, to the place. of course then I didn't know that David lives in New York - thats the name of the district of Newcastle he lives in! Spooky eh? Still...I would love to go to the Big Apple. Near to where I live is a Nature Reserve, with a huge lake in the middle and I go there sometimes to think and just...be. Days like that can really renew the spirit. Glad you enjoyed it. xxx
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3-19-08 on 2008-03-19 09:20:38 |
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God for you, I agree. I quit smoking for those reasons...I knew it was bad for me, and just a habit, so I kept thinking, why am I doing this??
Awareness is a powerful thing and will make all the difference.
Good luck and welcome to thoughts.com
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life after death???? on 2008-03-19 09:11:26 |
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I see your point, but I just cannot force myself to believe in God, heaven and hell etc, just incase its all true. I simply can't make myself believe anything. I believe the only way people live on is through the memories of those that loved them. It's not easy for me to live with that, because my dad died, and I do contradct myself because I find myself talking to him all the time and have never quite accepted that he is just gone and thats that.
I guess I am kinda spiritual, but I cannot assign myself to a religion because I can't believe in something that I cannot see to be true.
If this is all there is, and there is no heaven, then so be it. I think the important thing is to live life, and I live mine as if this is all there is, to make the most of it.
My thoughts on this are ever changing as I grow and learn, but for now...I cant force myself to believe in anything. I envy those that can, because they have an answer and explanation for everything, but as for me...I kinda like not knowing...
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Do You Fart In Bed????? on 2008-03-18 08:47:28 |
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Hehehehhehehehehehehehhehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe......xxxxx
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do we have free will???? on 2008-03-18 08:45:36 |
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Everything you just said is why I'm an Athiest. I refuse to be controlled in such a way. You make some excellent points. xxxxxx
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TOBASCO SAUCE IS IN THE HOUSE!! on 2008-03-17 19:12:43 |
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Aaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....he is just the cutest little guy I ever saw!! And yes, I do wanna eat him up...but don't worry, I wont! hehe x awe but seriously...bless...
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Cross. on 2008-03-17 19:06:11 |
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I wish I had just a speck of your writing talent...sigh... :-) xxx
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JUST WHEN THINGS DRY UP A PUPPY PEES IN MY BED ! on 2008-03-17 12:14:37 |
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awe....a puppy! They're just the best, arent they? I had a Jack Russell and a German Shepherd (hubby has them now, which is best for them I think) from babies. Dogs are awesome...they know when you're happy, they know when you're sad, they know when you need a hug, and when to leave you alone...best of all, they are totally loyal and full of unconditional love.
Its great to hear you sounding much happier. Peace and love to you xxx
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2 questions - unrealted on 2008-03-17 12:07:34 |
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As for the first question...I cant really see the point to him going there, unless it was just so others could see he cared enough to go! (?)
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2 questions - unrealted on 2008-03-17 12:05:56 |
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David has spent a year telling me I'm beautiful and even now I am not totally convinced, all the time. I still do not always see what he sees because no one else has ever said it to me.
Absolutely it has an impact in my opinion, it has for me. Fortunately, David is patient and doesn't tire of saying it, and the more he does, the more it sinks in that he finds me beautiful and my confidence is growing dramatically.
lastblastkl is right too, about the bad stuff sticking. Dunno why that is, but its true.
As a kid, I was labelled the smart one, and my sister the pretty one - thats not to say they said I was ugly, they just just didnt say I was pretty - does that make sense? Anyway, thats stuck into my adulthood. Its only the last year since I met someone who tells me all the time that he loves me, that I'm gorgoeus etc...that I have begun to feel attractive, wanted and even dare I say it sexy (smiles to herself and the very idea).
It matters to hear these words and yes, i do think it's a very big deal.
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Thoughts on 2008-03-16 20:44:54 |
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Hello again,
I am a sociology student at the moment and have been accepted onto a University course in September studying Sociology and Criminology for a BA (Hons).
I have to say, I am not as articulate, nor educated as you (wisdom is my eternal pursuit and a journey I have only just begun).
I have to say though, of all the theories of society I have studied, Marxism is the one that holds truest to me. I see examples of it in every day life.
I don't believe it can be applied to every society, mostly to Western society. It can been seen on a large scale and a small scale. Those in power seek to hold down those without it and do so by creating a false consciousness.
A small scale example - my college (amongst many, they are not alone) are seeking to eradicate the vast majority of academic courses in favour of vocational courses, such as plumbing. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be a plumber, the problem for me is that the choice to better ones self with academic thought and learning is being discouraged, outright blocked, in order to create the next generation of workers. The emphasis is placed firmly on getting a job and it is extremely difficult to get to University on a low income.
This nation is filled with people struggling to make ends meet on minimum wage and their means of escape are eternally blocked. Worse than that, to me, is that there are some who tell me they are content to live in this way, that their lives are not dictated in such a way - I believe this is what rulers want us to believe. That we have the power to mark our own destiny when this is just not the case. More and more our choices are being discretely withdrawn.
I believe little will change until the working classes realise what is happening, however I don't feel that an all out revolution would be effective or successful. A communist society would not be without its flaws (see Russia). But a fairer system for all should be implimented and this will never happen as long as people are so unaware of the control their everyday lives are under.
I hope at least some of this makes sense and will continue to read your blogs, so that I can expand my mind further. Thank you xxx
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my boyfriend is driving me CRAZY!!! on 2008-03-16 20:10:47 |
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yikes is he still alive or is this a confession...lol x :-)
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My Own Fault on 2008-03-16 18:12:55 |
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Was this taxi driver in Nottingham? man...I'm embarrassed. I hope aside from that moron you liked Nottingham...though having said that, I'm moving away from Nottingham so I guess I cant say much!
Good on you for giving him what for. People like him are why Islam has a bad name!
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Moving Baby, Moving Mummy on 2008-03-16 16:39:43 |
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I have travelled to Turkey, though not to Istanbul. I went in May 2000 and not long after they had quite a major earthquake.
I stayed in Bodrum on the Aegean coast (we spent a day on the Greek island of Kos). Whilst there we visited the salt plains of Pammukkale and the Holy site of Ephesus. if you ever go to Turkey, I strongly recommend you go there! Turkey's scenery is breath taking, the only place I've ever been that actually looks just as it does in the brochures! Apparently Istanbul has the equivalent of the population of England, living in a space the size of London - I'd love to go, just to see how they manage that!
If you make it there...let me know, I'll come too! haha xxx take care new friend xxx
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God Hates Ireland on 2008-03-16 16:32:57 |
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I think the potato famine was one of the most shameful periods in English history. Nothing anyone should be thankful for, thats for sure!
My ex-in laws are from (and live in) Northern Ireland, so I'm familiar with the differences between Catholics and Protestants but as I'm an Atheist myself, I tend to avoid making statements about any religion because I simply don't know what I'm talking about. It's a shame not everyone exercises the same caution!
Happy St Patricks day for Monday, by the way xxx
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St Patrick's 5k on 2008-03-16 16:27:25 |
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Wow, you have far more energy than I can even dream of. I wish you well. Thanks for your comment on my blog too, and I have to say, I think you were spot on.
Good luck with your plans!
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Moving Baby, Moving Mummy on 2008-03-16 14:41:08 |
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My dad's name was Greek (Peter) meaning 'stone' or 'strength' also...and mine is Heidi, which comes from a German name, Adelheide, meaning 'battle maid', which always made me giggle. I was, actually, as my mum confessed a couple of years ago, named after a neighbour's German Shepherd. Sigh...
I like the idea of the name meaning something though, and as a lover of academia (I would study for the rest of my life if I could afford to) Sophia (wisdom) is very appealing! xxx thanks again! xxx
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Moving Baby, Moving Mummy on 2008-03-16 14:36:49 |
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Wow, I really like those names and I know what you mean...some foreign names just seem to flow so much nicer. And its funny also, cause I was toying with the name 'Anna'...its just lovely and simple.
Thanks...if you think of any more, feel free to let me know xxx :-) xxx
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Bend. on 2008-03-16 14:25:54 |
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I really like this, even if it is a little dark. It struck a chord with me, some of the sentiments ring true from past experiences.
You have a real talent, I'm glad I have discovered it.
Best wishes xxx :-)
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Moving Baby, Moving Mummy on 2008-03-16 14:21:21 |
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Hi Badlydrawnstickman!
No, I'm not gonna name him/her sprog hehe. Although yes, that would be kinda cool, but not sure s/he would make it through school in one piece with a name like that!
If its a boy, David gets to name it and he will be called Stanley (Stan) Peter after his and my dads. If its a girl...I get to decide. But as yet I have no idea on names...any suggestions??
Thanks for stopping by xxx
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Thoughts on 2008-03-16 13:53:35 |
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I am a Marxist (workers of the world unite!) and I find your blogs very interesting and thought provoking.
Thanks for posting on thoughts.com
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THE WORLD'S EASIEST QUIZ (Passing requires only 4 on 2008-03-16 13:20:14 |
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Yikes...and I'm off to Uni in September...boy are they lucky to have me...
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is it normal? on 2008-03-15 17:13:16 |
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I felt my baby kick for the first time this evening...I love every part of being pregnant, even the constant peeing! I was a big girl anyways, so I'm not worried about getting bigger.
Congrats to you! xxx peace and love xxx
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I FELT MY BABY MOVE!!!!! on 2008-03-15 17:06:36 |
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S/he is due 2nd of August...for some reason we both believe it is a girl (have a habit of saying 'she') but really we just want her (oops) or him to be healthy and happy.
It's a truly awesome, surreal, and actually quite humbling thing to experience. Only wish David had been here to feel it too... xxx
Thanks for your kind words xxx
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Ahhh Paranoid on 2008-03-15 09:30:08 |
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I agree with eeerm...time for a new phone I reckon! Creepy stuff xxx
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The Ship on 2008-03-15 06:43:06 |
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Thank you...I have always loved it. When my dad died, we went to see him at the chapel of rest (I needed to see him some other way then lying dead on our sofa), and this verse was up on the wall. It helped so much, I just think it's a lovely way of putting it. There's a quote, 'Every exit is an entrance somewhere' I like that too.
Thank you for commenting xxx peace xxx
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Back to the wife on 2008-03-14 19:03:19 |
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I'm sure she must have thought about it alot, but maybes didn't know what to say. (?)
Maybe she is staying even though she is sure you don't love her because she isnt ready to let go yet. Even though I had fallen out of love with my husband, I still found it hard to end it, because during married life, your lives become entwined and predictable and its hard to break from that, even when you know its for the best.
I hope you are able to resolve things soon, for yours and your wife's sake. This can't be doing either of you any good, just going around in circles.
Wishing you all the best as ever xxx
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Welcome on 2008-03-14 17:10:11 |
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Welcome to thoughts.com. I'm English, at college and headed to University in September - after I've had my baby in August.
Hope you have a great time on this site.
xxx peace xxx
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Take this as a new start on 2008-03-14 17:01:56 |
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I hope you have success here, and find all you are looking for. Welcome to thoughts.com! xxx
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English study on 2008-03-14 12:56:51 |
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Hi, I would be happy to help you anyway you like. I can only imagine English is very difficult to learn as a second language!
Oh, and welcome to thoughts.com
xxx
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Gator on 2008-03-14 07:48:15 |
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hehe...another good one xxx
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Maybe it gets better from here,,,I hope on 2008-03-14 05:21:11 |
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My fella is 44 and nuttier than squirrel turds, completely high on life. He says that this has been the best year of his life.
Life is as you make it, but also partly dependent on those around you.
I hope you find your happiness too, and soon xxx
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WHIPPED AND SCARED SHITLESS ! on 2008-03-12 20:28:23 |
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I feel for you and only wish I lived just around the corner! Like I say...I was just so lucky I had someone to go to, or I would still be there, of that I am sure. You have the support of your children, which is of paramount importance.
Maybes you shouldn't leave yet. I heard alot of people saying women like us should just leave, and I know it is not as simple as that. A woman is most at risk during the time she starts to think of leaving, and the time she does leave.
So maybe if you think you can you should stick it out until you can draw up a battle plan, so to speak. Work out what the problems will be and see if, one by one, you can find a solution.
Its okay to be afraid, and perfectly normal...all I can say is do what you feel is right for you, in your own way and in your own time. If that means biting your lip for a while and staying, that doesn't make you weak, it makes you stronger than ever. Don't be afraid to ask for help either.
I just wanted you to know that although you might feel it, you're not alone. I know that doesnt help you on a practical level, after all, all these good thoughts and well-wishes are of no use when its just you and his fist, but hopefully on an emotional level it will help you, and give you more strength. I used to feel that the abuse was partly my fault, cause sometimes I opened my mouth when I should have kept it shut. I should have been smarter about it.
You will have great highs of confidence and then great lows of fear and doubt but I still feel things are due to come good for you real soon...call it intuition or whatever you like. But you've had your crap, taken it like a true classy lady and your time is here to shine. Just do it your way and take your time.
I'm an email away, and if you want details of other ways to contact me, just let me know. I cant do much, from way over here, but I can listen and in some way empathise.
I'm thinking of you and hope you will be okay. xxx
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WHIPPED AND SCARED SHITLESS ! on 2008-03-12 18:51:59 |
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Please do as you said and take it one day at a time...don't think beyond tomorrow. A way through will come to you, and you will struggle for a long time, but it will be worth it, when after a time you find that the things that were once hard are getting easier. I have no doubt, even from what little I know about you, that you are more capable than probably even you realise you are.
I was fortunate that i left into the arms of someone else. I don't know that I would have left at all otherwise.
I think its incredible how open you are about the whole thing...no one really knows just how bad things got for me, I've never found the strength to talk about most of it, or to admit just how bad things were for a time.
You have so much support, emotional and otherwise, from your kids and your many friends on here. Everyone is rooting for you, everyone believes in you. You CAN do it.
Stay safe and keep faith in yourself, and in God if that helps you.
Everything will come good for you, because you are a good person who desrerves it. I wish you peace and lots of luck. hang in there. Lots of love xxx H xxx
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My friend's suicide on 2008-03-12 17:02:38 |
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That is a very commendable thing to do, and I hope will be a way for them to come to terms with their loss. I cant begin to imagine how they, or you are feeling, but you are in my thoughts.
peace and love xxx
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he said on 2008-03-12 16:58:46 |
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I agree...the problem is your husbands, not yours. If you are unhappy, you are not 'creating' a problem...there is a problem there. Throughout my marriage I was constantly told no one else would ever want or put up with me, but guess what? Someone else did and I am with him now...and never happier.
Be aware that your self esteem is being played with, eaten away at, and try not to let it happen.
Above all, never apologise for being you.
So I guess I think half of the problem, as mots says, is with your husband trying to control you, and the other half of the problem is you allowing him too.
I hope you find the strength to believe in yourself and wish you well xxx
peace and love to you xxx
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REPOSTED THE OLD BLOG ! on 2008-03-12 15:18:11 |
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I am so, so happy for you and proud of you, the last post made my day.
What you talked about was very familiar to me, as my marriage was abusive too. The best thing I ever did was end it and move on with a wonderful man who wouldn't know how to hurt me or anyone else.
There are only wonderful things in your future and as I said...I am so happy for you!! xxx Well done xxx
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the 160 failure...PLEASE HELP ME :( on 2008-03-12 15:11:53 |
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Hiya...well, I am a big girl and I always have been, but its only been the last couple of years I've been okay with it.
All through school I was called all sorts of names and made to feel bad. As I've got older I've grown in confidence and it has come to matter less and less to me. I don't see the sense in diets, because unless you can keep it up for life, the weight will come back.
I am currently a UK size twenty, and I have never been happier. There was a time when I reached a size 26, and I was unhappy then because I could feel it, I felt unhealthy. I don't now. I love my curves, its who I am, how I'm meant to be.
I think a massive part of the weight issue is not physical, its emotional, psychological. One of the characteristics of anorexia, for example, is that they will still believe they are fat, even when they weigh next to nothing.
It worries me not that you are (or feel you are) overweight, but that you hate yourself so much for it. I think you first need to deal with that.
I have a man who absolutely loves me, every lump and bump and you know what? So do I! I would like to be a little smaller than I am now, but I don't wanna be thin.
If you do wanna lose weight, all I'd say is do it right, don't consider abandoning food altogether. If you starve yourself, all that will happen is when you do eat, your body will hang on to all the fat, because it wont know when it will get more. I hope I'm making sense.
My sister is diet obsessed and some things she does are ridiculous, but some make sense. Like never miss breakfast. Drink flavoured water if you don't like it plain. Chew your food, each mouthfull, ten times, and stop eating when you are full, even if there is food left on the plate. Don't deprive yuorself of food you love and make yourself eat food you don't. I hate fruit, so I don't make myself eat it, I just eat more vegetables.
To avoid people who are less than supportive, just don't tell them if you plan to diet. And then when you lose weight people will start to notice.
Above all...learn to love yourself as you are...it took me 27 years, but I am there, and if I lost weight now (unlikely as I am 4 months pregnant!) then it would be a bonus.
I'm sure your boyfriend loves you as you are, and I am sure that you are a beautiful young woman, with or without the puppy fat. Beauty is both external and internal.
I hope you'll be okay and feel better about yourself real soon xxx peace and love xxx
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Moving forward, in a better mood. on 2008-03-12 06:26:16 |
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I had logged on to comment on your last blog, so I'm really pleased to find that you're feeling much better. I was gonna say just to be careful...make sure that the sex doesn't just become a way of making a baby, and cease to be something special between you and your husband - thats what happened in my marriage. If it happens you will lose one meaningful way to show each other your love and problems will ensue. It will begin to feel like a chore, and if you don't fall pregnant it will lead to fear and frustration which you will take out on each other. Just make sure you take it easy and remember that sex makes a baby, and making love means that your baby will have loving, happy parents.
I'm sure you're gonna be fine and I still have all my fingers and toes crossed for you!
Take care of each other and keep smiling.
Peace and love xxx
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Love Me or I Die on 2008-03-11 16:57:02 |
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My husband used to say just that to me...thats why I stayed as long as I did. But then one day my sister said to me...that's not love, its blackmail, and at the end of the day, you are not responsible for his actions. I knew she was right, but I couldn't bear the thought of what he might do if I left. Of course, in the end I did leave...because eventually a time comes when you have to do what's right for you, maybe be a little bit selfish. My sister was right, only he is responsible for his actions. He is still very much alive!
I did just want to add that yes, we do make our decisions and have to deal with the consequences...but we are also allowed to change our minds, and its not wrong to walk away. Put yourself first...because if you don't...no one else will.
I'm ever hopeful of a happy ending for you.
Peace and love to you xxx
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Waist length hair and a hair cut on 2008-03-10 18:11:05 |
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If you love your hair long...keep it long hun! If you're not sure about having it short, just get a trim, a couple of inches off. Once its done...it'll take ages to grow back, so just make sure you'll be happy and comfortable. It's easy for others to say you should get your hair cut, but you will have to live with it. Good luck! xxx
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No jets yet on 2008-03-10 13:00:47 |
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I second that...I completely understand why you're doing what you're doing. Good things are gonna happen for you both, I just know it. Take care xxx
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my boobs are taking over my body.... on 2008-03-10 04:53:50 |
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that's I shouldn't worry...lol x
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my boobs are taking over my body.... on 2008-03-10 04:52:59 |
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Awe, thank you...I will certainly try. And I should worry...you're a nice guy, I have no doubt you will be remembered with great fondness and love...peace and love to you xxx
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HELPFUL EYEWITNESS on 2008-03-10 04:49:35 |
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heheheheheheheheeheheheehehe........just the sort of thing my ex would have said...hehe
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The Hidden Part of a Woman on 2008-03-09 15:01:22 |
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Wow...this is so true. Just the other week, I was talking to my love and saying how I couldn't believe the change in me this past year or so...it's like even I didn't know about that hidden part of me, until he brought it out of me.
He has been patiently sitting back and waiting for me to 'blossom' as he puts it, telling me that there is a truely vibrant, confident young woman inside me trying to get out, and all the while he still doesn't realise...he not only brought her to the surface, he probably made her in the first place.
What I mean is...he is such an integral part of me, my other half, that I am who I am only when I am with him. So I think this hidden part is so rare because it only comes into existance when we are with our 'one', the person who completes us.
What I'm saying is...sometimes we keep it hidden, because of past hurts, etc...and sometimes we don't even know its there, until you love someone so completely that you give yourself over to them and get the same in return.
Another insightful post and I'm rambling now...lol xxx
Peace and love to you xxx
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The First Step... on 2008-03-09 08:12:12 |
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Go for it! Always have fun, you have the right attitude to life. I'd add paragliding, I did t twice and it was both terrifying and exhillerating...awesome!
Welocme to thoughts.com xxx
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| Posted in
Life is it about living or surviving? on 2008-03-09 07:42:22 |
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Good for you! I always say there's living and there's being alive and they're not the same thing. I don't know if it's cause I'm not really religious, but to me the journey is much more important than the destination, and my life is my journey, so I'm gonna enjoy it. Since I made this decision I've never been so happy.
Life is short, make the most of it. have fun!
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| Posted in
Jesus and the Devil on 2008-03-08 11:28:38 |
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A very, very interesting post and I gotta say...I agree with every part of it. I'm an athiest and am forever being told that even if I don't believe in God, he believes in me, but what is that supposed to mean to me? Even when you aren't religious its like you're still supposed to base your life around God and religion. Well I don't, and its refreshing to hear someone else who doesnt either!
Thanks for balancing things out xxx
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| Posted in
Updates! on 2008-03-07 16:04:46 |
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I'm glad to hear you're doing okay. Congrats on the move too...I'm sure you'll be much happier in the new place. Things seem to be falling into place very nicely...some might call it 'nest building' (smile) so if you're not...you know...now, I am confident its just a matter of time! Fingers still crossed for you!! xxxx
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| Posted in
Is It Patience or Life Passing By? on 2008-03-07 06:26:25 |
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I've followed your story for a while now, and have to say it has truly touched me. You are a truly selfless individual, and your wife is luckier than she realises most probably.
Can I say one thing though, and please don't be offended if I am being too personal...your posts are always filled with sadness, its like I can almost hear you sighing sometimes. I think that's a great shame for someone who is obviously such a nice guy.
I just think sooner, rather than later, I'd like to hear that you did something that was just for YOU. After all, you deserve to be happy too. I may be way off the mark, and if I am, forgive me...
Good things do come to those who wait, but that doesn't mean sitting back and letting it come to you...I think you need to put everything you can into it, and the rest will come to you. Does that make any sense? Probably not...lol
Anyway, I wish you peace and happiness and a decent person like you...is surely due something wonderful to happen.
Peace xxx
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| Posted in
What is love? on 2008-03-06 12:22:07 |
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Awe...thats lovely and so true. Thanks for sharing...hope you're doing okay and still smiling through the curse of the tennant! Take care friend xxx
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| Posted in
Two years on 2008-03-06 10:41:11 |
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Wow...another beautiful post...when I read it, it was like reading about myself too...I cant get over how similar our situations are. It makes me realise too how lucky I am...David lives 160 miles away, I don't know how I would cope if he lived in a whole other country!
You and KP are a mark of how true love can find a way, and you will be together one day, of that I have no doubt, because I am sure you two are meant, and because you are prepared to wait for it, fight for it and endure anything for it.
Thanks for your comment on my post and I will indeed wish on a star for you both and hope you have the happy ending I have had...or rather, the happy beginning.
A lovely tribute...thanks for sharing xxx
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| Posted in
Lies or Heartbreak? on 2008-03-05 08:41:18 |
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You're completely right...sometimes its hard to decide whether to lie or tell the truth and hurt someone...thats the quandary I was in so long with my husband before I left him.
I think in the end you have to be truthful and cause the heartache, because the lies go on and on (and so inevitably does the heartache)...but once the truth is out there, it can be dealth with. And the beauty of the human heart is...even when it is broken, it can be fixed...it heals.
I have been in both situations. I have been lied to and I have lied. I had had my heart broken and I have broken a heart. It takes time and hurts like hell, but its better than the alternative in the long term, because as long as there's lies...no one can move on from it.
What I told myself when I eventually left was...if hubby wasn't right for me...then I can't be right for him either, and by leaving, I was setting us both free...even if he didn't feel that way to start with...one day when his soulmate walks through the door...he will.
Beautiful song by the way...i heard the George Michael version a while ago and the words are so poignant and so true.
Great post xxx peace and love to you xxx
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| Posted in
Winking at us on 2008-03-05 08:34:19 |
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I like men who are men and I like chivarly, its nice!
I'm a sociology student and was asked to explain to a room full of feminists the other day why I don't agree with alot of feminist thought. My reason is this - I'm all for equality between men and women, but I personally feel that there's nothing wrong with women being feminine and a bit girlie and men being men. That's just what works for me. I have a man who opens doors, if we go out to eat he pays the bill (and I always insist on a 50/50 split, but have not succeeded yet). He likes to look after me and if I try to tell him he doesn't need to do that, he'll always say he knows, he wants to...it makes him happy. So I figure...if he's happy and I am, thats a good thing! He makes me feel safe and protected and secure without me feeling like I've compromised on my independence.
Men now are too afraid of ridicule or being accused of discrimination. If they don't do these things, they are rude, if they do they are patronising women! I say...give me a real man anyday...one who will treat me like an equal without compromising his masculinity. And I will keep on being a girlie...I'm not an airhead, I know my own mind, I'm intelligent and I'm in charge of my own future and career, but I'm also looked after.
Fortunately for me, I found that man. He takes charge in most situations, because thats how he likes it, and how I like it, and it works for us.
I hope that made sense!
All I'm saying is...whats wrong with a woman wanting to feel like a lady, and a man wanting to behave like a gentleman? It's not always detrimental to women, its not to me.
I think you've touched on a very good point.
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| Posted in
A Quote For The Ladies on 2008-03-04 18:24:40 |
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Awe...thats so sweet...and such wisdom from one so young...she will be just fine when she's older! It reminded me of the quote at the end of Love Story for some reason...
'Love means never having to say you're sorry.'
I will remember Sarah's quote xxx
p.s. I'm so happy I can say...I found my rainnbow, and he brings great light to my life. 'The one' is definitely out there...I know, cause I found mine. xxx Peace and much love xxx
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| Posted in
If you had only one week on 2008-03-04 18:20:00 |
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Wow...I'm not sure what I'd do! But the thing you said about being afraid to sleep...I'm like that anyway. I only sleep for about four hours and its become something of a disorder for me now...I've always hated sleeping cause I felt like I was 'wasting time'....what usually happens, is every few weeks I sleep for like...twelve hours.
Anyhoo...back to the question. I guess I would just want those I love and who love me around me all the time...and if they were, what we did wouldn't matter xxx
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| Posted in
The question no one ever asks... on 2008-03-04 03:53:43 |
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The thing over here is, no one seems to notice the things you mentioned until the young person has committed a serious offence, and then it's like 'condemn them for life, they are evil scum...lets not waste time finding out why, lets just remove them and forget about them.'
The trouble now with teachers is that they have no real power...kids know, that if they tell them off, all they have to do is say they were assaulted, or cry rape and the law is on their side.
Social services over here needs some serious work. That's not to say there aren't some wonderful people working for them, but they have a reputation (earned i think) for getting it wrong on many occasions.
It's all down to how much money they government is willing to put into these things. You mentioned poverty. That's one of the main reasons I think. We have this gang culture over here that in the US you'll be familiar with. The trouble is Britain is a small island with alot of young people. There's alot of territorialism going on...gangs sort of have their own 'turf' and I think thats alot to do with ownership. Kids have died for passing an invisible turf boundary. They just need something to do, something they can say is theirs and kids from inner city areas and estates don't have that...
To use the example of London...there are the posh, high flying areas and then right next door there will be a run-down estate - high rise flats, buildings in disrepair, tantatmount to a ghetto. They look at these other people, in expensive cars, with expensive jewellery and there's no way they can have those things, because there's no one to help them into those areas...they are forgotten about. So they look and think...'I want that, I'm just gonna take it.'
People don't see the reason, they just see the crime, but I just think...unless people listen to young people and find out WHY they will never solve anything.
As you can tell, this is something I feel very passionate about...that's why I am hoping to have a career in youth work or youth justice.
Thanks for stopping by! Hope the leg is a bit better xxx
peace xxx
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| Posted in
My thoughts: Why homosexuality is considered wrong on 2008-03-03 19:37:43 |
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I completely agree with you. To many problems exist not when people believe that something is wrong, but when they then try to force their opinion onto others.
I say...live and let live. What matters most is that a person is happy. And if we don't like something...we don't do it ourselves. We can only see the world through our own eyes, and we only know what is right for ourselves. Great post xxx
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| Posted in
Pro-life or Pro-abortion? on 2008-03-03 18:05:54 |
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Yeah, I think generally we are in agreement about it in principle being a bad thing...I just have trouble getting my head round it because its such a tough subject. It always frustrated me more than anything because I struggled to have a baby...and now I have one growing in me...I cant imagine getting rid of it (her, I reckon, lol). But then I'm fortunate to have a lovely guy by my side!
Hope my last comment didnt seem rude xxx
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