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| I just wanna scream, please!
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I woke up this morning sad and feeling quite empty, and dreading going to work. My alarm on my phone plays "shine" and the sun rays creep in my room through my blinds biding me to wake up! Like today is sapost to be a good day, but in my heart I still feel horrible. Ugh! I don't know what to do to get him off my mind, and what he's doing to my feelings is taking my emotions for a spin. I just wanted to throw up, I am that disgusted with myself. I don't know, whatever. Walking into the marina, where I work, I help a rental get through their paperwork and after i'm finished my bosses wife asks me to please leave so not to get everyone sick, all i had was a cough, but i guess that was all she needed. I don't even think I'm sick, I leave anyways, just to get an extra day off where I can do nothing besides think. Blah!
Last night still plays in my head like a movie. I saw him and it was like we were together, but at the end of it we still aren't. And I know that we are sapost to be, and everytime I think about it I just get frusterated and hurt....GRRRRRRRRRR! I could just scream!
And now my best friend is making moves on me, and some guy at my school that I never hung out with is calling me all the time.......it hasn't even been a week and I just don't want the attention....all I want is him! Ahhhhhhh! I don't know. I feel like a crazy person!!! So send me to the nut house, put me in a padded room, and let me scream til' i can't scream anymore! Please!
Whatever, this weekend is Blissfest, and I'm actually going to go, and I'm proly going to be so wasted that I won't remember a thing....at least for the time being, sadly I feel like I have to get wasted all the time now just to help deal with the situation.....having a broken heart sucks huge balls!
Blahhhhhhhhhhhh....Fuck my life right now seriously! |
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Posted by charli on 2008-07-09 09:59:10 | Rating: | Views: 90
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Hey, you probably don't want to hear it, but what you are going through will make you a stronger, wiser, nicer person... that will occurr when your heart heals a little.
Take your time, no rush.... good luck
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Posted by EasyToSay
on 2008-07-09 10:08:09
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keep writeing, i hope you feel better, take care of your heart ok? if you want to talk, well i feel like screaming and yelling also all about a man, hope you can smile today,peace
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Posted by bjm1
on 2008-07-09 10:09:49
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boy have i been there!....all too recently actually. taht feeling of not being able to get him off your mind is so scary! i cant really give advise because my heart is too close to the situation but i can tell you that it gets better....its a day to day choice to just be ok. sometimes it is a hour to hour choice to be ok. just make that choice! your life is way more precious than any jerk. trust me! just keep going and let your heart heal.
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Posted by april_michelle
on 2008-07-09 10:21:14
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Broken hearts do suck. But make sure to keep your mind and heart open and it will lead you in the right direction.
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Posted by LadiLucifer
on 2008-07-09 10:29:17
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