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| Pornographic Rhinocerous.
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I don't particularly enjoy the way my life is going right now to say the very, very least, which isn't odd for me. I tend to be short winded...if that's even a phrase. Did you think this post was going to be about porn? Well, it could be, I'm not entirely sure. I tend to title things before I write them. So who knows?
Oh the escapist in me is dying to go live with my grandma right now. I cringe at the thought of post-mortem counseling....just me, my brother and my father....who is an abslotute horror with emotions. I hate that I have no one to blame...that it happened this way instead of in some horrible accident, where I could point a finger in the face of some guilty motherfucker....no, God had to whisk her quietly and gracefully away from us. And all that remains is this emptiness, like a dark pit into which no light can shine to sound cliche, but it's true.
Loss is a horrifying thing, especially in the stage of life that I'm in...just floating, thinking about college, maybe...I'm horrible at concentrating. I would love to work, to feel productive again....I am smothered.
butterfly barricade
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