Part 1 Christmas/Holiday gift shopping
This is a test to see if you make the naughty or nice list this holiday season. Answer truthfully based on your gut instinct.
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1)If you see someone trying to stash something somewhere on their person in an effort to steal it,
do you:
A)Let them do their thing? [It's not your responsibility.]
(- 3 pts)
B)Report the matter to a clerk/authority immediately?
(+ 5 pts)
C)Shout at them "Hey! Don't do that!" or "Drop it, dirtbag!"(like Robocop)?
(- 2 pts)
D)Say "Hey! That's a good idea!" and join them? (- 5 pts)
2)If you are being helped and the "clerk" stops to take a phone call on an office/work phone, do you:
A)Shout "Hey! I don't have all day, pal!"? (- 5 pts)
B)Ask politely "Can you please put that on hold and help me?" (how nice of you, but still - 3 pts)
C)Wait patiently knowing that everyone needs help and the place may be short-handed? [The "clerk" is likely not trying to ignore or abandon you.] (+ 5 pts)
3)If you are waiting in a checkout line, and someone up front is making a scene(probably to get a deal they don't deserve), do you:
A)Try to ignore them and wait patiently? (+ 4 pts)
B)Run up to them, grab them by the shoulders and--after kneeing them between the legs--say "Knock it off, you freak!" (daring, but - 5 pts)
C)Try to ignore them, wait patiently and--if trouble arises that puts a life in danger--lend a hand only then? (+ 3 pts)
4)You are passing through a part of the store and come across two employees having a confrontation(could be personal or work related). Do you:
A)Ask the employees to take their argument elsewhere because it is unsettling for customers to see such a display?
(+ 3 pts)
B)Avoid getting involved and continue shopping(perhaps not in the area if it is not vital)? (+ 4 pts)
C)Step into it and and say "Hey! Knock it off, you two! I'm shoppin' here!"? (- 2 pts)
D)Make yourself a part of it/Join in the "fun"? (- 3 pts)
5)It's a busy day, and you find "traffic" to be rather frustrating. You find an aisle that is impassible because of blockage(merchandise, staff or busybody customers) but need to get something from that aisle regardless. [Note: This isn't much of a Naughty/Nice question, but I will ask it anyway and make it work.] Do you:
A)Say "Forget it. It's too much trouble. I can't take it." and leave the store? (- 2 pts)
B)Force your way through without a word or conscience--even if it means someone gets bumped or merchandise gets damaged--because you need to finish your shopping mission?
(- 4 pts)
C)Find another way around and pick your moment to get in there to get what you want? (+ 5 pts)
D)Say "Excuse me. Can I get through here?"(provided someone is standing there), and hopefully they will be nice and move for you? [Otherwise try another option as a follow-up] (+ 4 pts)
E)Shout "Coming through!" and charge down the aisle with reckless abandon and let God sort out the pieces? (- 5 pts)
6)You come across a lost child looking for his/her mommy on the verge of tears. Do you:
A)Leave the kid be to fend for him/herself? They are not your responsibility, and you don't want to be accused of being a predator/kidnapper. (- 3 pts)
B)Say "Beat it, kid! I don't have time for ankle biters like you!" (provided you come in that close of contact with them) and kick them to the curb?(- 5 pts)
C)Take the kid by the hand and help them find their mommy?
(- 2 pts)
D)Take the kid home with you(cuz you just can't resist a cute little face and may have another alterior motive for kidnapping)? (- 5 pts)
E)Escort the kid to a store employee/manager/security guard and have them make an announcement over the PA system?
(+ 5 pts)
7)You are having a difficult time shopping for someone close to you. [Shame on you for not knowing them well enough to handle the situation better:P] Do you:
A)Give up and confess you couldn't think of anything? [Leaving it at that.] (- 3 pts)
B)Settle for a gift card? (- 4 pts)
C)Give them cash? (- 2 pts)
D)Ask someone to help you figure it out? (+ 5 pts)
E)Tell the person "You are a hard-ass person to shop for because you practically HAVE everything anyone could ever need!!"? (- 3 pts)
F)Give yourself more time to shop next year(or make up for the gift on the next special day) and/or talk to the person to try and jostle some ideas from your head? (+ 3 pts)
8)You are hastily moving through an aisle or picking through a rack of merchandise and accidentally knock something to the floor. It is now damaged by your "hand". Do you:
A)Take the item to an employee and explain that you were responsible for damaging it before asking if you can pay for it? [Maybe you can even get it at a discounted price for your honesty...if it's not completely broken and worthless.] (+ 5 pts)
B)Let it go/Set it down gently and quietly scurry away?
(- 5 pts)
C)Cry "Oh, my gosh! What have I done?!" thus drawing attention to yourself and said item? (- 2 pts)
D)Let it go and THEN take a perfectly good one to the register/s? (- 4 pts)
9)You are stuck in a long checkout line and not totally comfortable with the situation. [Perhaps you are on a tight schedule.] Do you:
A)Shout "Hey! Can you get some more help up here?! I don't have all day!"? (- 5 pts)
B)Wait patiently and try to divert your mind with amusing thoughts/music? (+ 5 pts)
C)Fill your time by talking with the person/s next to you?
(+ 3 pts)
D)Do whatever it takes to skip in line? (- 4 pts)
E)Step out and try to find a shorter line? (+ 2 pts)
10)You receive a gift you do NOT either want, need or like. Do you:
A)Say "Ew! No! Take it back!"? (- 4 pts)
B)Say "I can't accept this. Please, give it to someone else more deserving."? (+ 4 pts)
C)Ask for a gift receipt to exchange/return it yourself?
(+ 0 pts)
D)Accept it graciously but then turn and dispose of it or pass it on to someone else? (- 3 pts)
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So, how did we do? How nice or naughty are you?
+40 and up = Saint. Treat yourself to a pleasure trip.
+30 to 39 = Guardian Angel. Buy yourself something nice and not too expensive.
+20 to 29 = Good Samaritan. Treat yourself to a show(stage or movie).
+10 to 19 = Messenger of Good Will. Treat yourself to a favorite dessert or non-alcoholic drink.
+0 to 9 = Nice person. Pat yourself on the back.
-1 to 9 = Dork. Try a little harder next time.
-10 to 19 = Careless fool. Count your blessings.
-20 to 29 = Total jerk. While standing, take your left foot and slam it down onto your right foot. Give a meal to a homeless person or throw a few cans of food in one of those collection bins.
-30 to 39 = Asshole. Slap yourself hard across the face(repeat if necessary til you learn your lesson). Donate at least a third of what you roughly spent in the past six months to charity.
-40 and below = Royal flush face. Not only should you be ashamed of yourself, but you need to stick your head in a toilet and give it a good flush(repeat if necessary). Avoid shopping for anything other than absolute necessities for at least six months. [No luxury items. Just food, toiletries, etc.]