When you work in a job where your purpose is to unite an entire community; every business, student, and donor possible, around a cause, it can become difficult to turn it off. The first six months I worked at JA, I had a lot of trouble actually stopping working. Now, when I was a teacher, I wasn't exactly the 8 to 3:30 type either, but it just seems that when you work for a non-profit, you can't afford to turn it off. There are over 200 charities in my community of just 100,000 people. We all need people. We all need money. We are all trying to get ahead, and frankly, not all, but most of the causes are worthy and I would love to see everyone supporting them. Sometimes I feel like I am driving myself crazy and I have become some freak clone-soldier for Junior Achievement. From 7:45-5:00 Monday through Friday, my job is to make sure every teacher I come across loves our programs, every business leader feels compelled to teach a class, and every available donor who hears our stories of success feels inspired to invest in our cause. Everything I say and do for nine (or more) hours a day is for JA, and it has sucked me in. I love my job. However, as a person, JA is not my life. My husband, my son, and my hobbies (which are now mere faint memories) are who (and what) make me "Brittany". But now, even on the weekends and at nights, I find myself scouting out events of other prominent non-profits, scouring the yellow pages for new businesses to recruit, writing e-mails in an effort to rake in more volunteers. When we drive by a car lot on the way to Target to get groceries, I scribble notes on the backs of receipts of my ideas for getting the sales people involved with our kids. When I see cute ads on TV, I think of new marketing gimicks for our audience. It just seems I can never get JA out of my head. Even though I love my job, I wish I could stop. I have such a naturally competitive nature, a drive to get ahead in my career, and a focus that often causes people to describe me as "stubborn," that sometimes I realize that although I am doing great things for my organization, great things for our nearly 30,000 students, and changing the economic landscape of our state, sometimes working for JA means not being a very nice person. I actually have to make a conscious effort to kick back and turn off work. When I am in this moment, I have found it takes an intense focus just to turn off "JA" in my brain and focus on the other pleasures in my life. I don't want to be just another green solider in an army of non-profit ball busters. I want to remember what makes me unique, what makes me a great mom and a fun wife, yet still be the best Education Manager our organization has ever seen. Can this be done? I hope so. I think I am learning slowly. But, I am laying on my couch during my only break for the next 358 days, writing about work and thinking about how full my e-mail box will be on Wednesday...and wondering if this conflict I feel inside is just adulthood or the sultry aura of the non-profit realm that has invaded my passionate spirit. I am hoping the latter is true...and that I get strong enough to resist the lure of my cause and just be Brittany the wife/mom/person once the clock strikes 5.