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Hello Friend,
I guess ill start with a question
or maybe its just a statement
Isnt it strange how much can change over such a short period of time?
Yeah i guess it is
how is there a way to rate happiness
and how can i increase it?
someone needs to write a book about it
i will
and it will be titled
"Tough Luck"
and it will talk about all these happy people
and all their conquests
then, at the end, it will say
"so, how can you become happy? Well if your not already, then just stop trying...let it come to you"
i wonder about all these people who give advise
this lady on the radio i have to listen to always gives out advice to some poor slub before playing some sappy love song
and i usually block it out, thinking..."just get over it!" or my favorite "GOD TURN THE STATION!!!"
but i caught myself listening in on a caller
and she was talking about how she was just getting married and how hard it was going with the both of them, and how she didnt think this is what marriage should be
and the advice was not what i expected.
the host said something like "you cant wait around expecting change to come, youve got to work on it"
i dont know, its a very common saying, and it really isnt that influencial
but it must have been the right moment for me to hear it
because i stopped my work, and just sat in awe over the words that just knocked on my brain
"thats way too true"
now is the part where most people would relate it to themselves
but i didnt really find a decent enough route to fit it in with me
because
its always around me
and ive changed
i hope for the better
i just dont want to be like anyone i know really
so damned....cavey
i like to think that people are basically good
its only society that makes you 'bad'
and ive seen so many people whove given into the social pressures to become bad
not in a bad way, not criminally
but just
slightly racist, ignorant, egotistical, delusional, and politically self-centered
i felt myself slipping into some of these places
and i feel the need, because of my Buddhist studies, to keep my mind clear of these things.
someone ive recently gotten to know
somehow
had all the worst luck that life could spit onto you
and it didnt change them
they turned out alright
and
it gave me hope
hope in humanity
hope in myself
hope for everyone out there whos ever smashed a fly just because, or taken a bit more just because
if they can survive life
why cant i
why cant we
it makes me smile
ive been lookin all around for this insight
for 3 years in college, inside my friends and family, drugs
and even myself
and then in just one moment
the least likely person, saying the least likely thing, can bring it out
its been sitting in me all my life
and it feels so damn to finally find it and write it out
i think college should be a place where everyone can learn this
but it wasnt for me
my teacher wasnt paid, she just sat down and talked
i love 4am talks
with myself
or with a dear friend
just to remind myself that im not alone
and i will never be
so long as people out there still live
for themselves
thanks for listening,
Ben
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Posted by benventure on 2008-04-22 04:00:00 | Rating: | Views: 94
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Someone said "to change the world, start with yourself". I think you started long ago Ben, your only just realising it now.
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Posted by scotslad60
on 2008-05-01 11:58:57
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