The 'tomato incident' had made Ed and his Grandmother even closer, and they passed a quiet winter together playing checkers, doing jigsaw puzzles and having tomato soup made from store-bought tomatoes. They had decided to grow watermellons, zucchini and pumpkins in the garden this year, although the thought of pumpkins made Ed nervous. He was sitting on the back porch wondering if he shouldn't convince her to plant some nice, quiet flowers instead when he heard her voice calling him from inside.
"Ed, dear! Are these your friends coming up the front walk?
Ed got up, opened the screen door and walked through the kitchen and up the hall to the front window where his Grandmother was standing looking out. In fact, Ed's hot skater babe friends, Shelli with and 'i', 'Trina, Vicki with an 'i', and Stella were approaching the house.
But something was very wrong with them.
They had turned an awful shade of grey which was not very 'hot' at all. Their eyes were dry and dull and staring without blinking. Shelli was covered in flies and maggots were coming out her nose. And to think that she had been the hottest.
Ed reasoned that going skating on the concrete containers at the toxic waste dump had not been good for them.
"Um, Gran, could you see if my new shirt is dry yet?"
"Of course, dear, and if it is, I'll press it for you so you'll look nice for your friends." she answered and tottered off happily toward the laundry room.
Ed was getting frantic. The zombie girls that used to be his friends were almost at the front porch. He looked around the front room and saw nothing to defend himself with. Racing down the hall, he entered the kitchen and grabbed the first thing within reach; a large frying pan hanging over the stove. He turned to run back just in time to hear their heavy, dead footsteps on the front porch.
Ed reached the front door as Vicki pulled at it and her fingernails scattered like sunflower seeds on the porch. Ed hit the door running, forcing it open, and knocking Vicki backwards into the other three.
He had to wonder if that had been such a good idea, because a moment later all four turned their dead eyes toward him and said in unison, "Ed's brain..."
Ed said, "Sorry guys, I've gotta keep my brain" and swung the frying pan.
It turned out that they were far more decayed than they appeared. The base of frying pan hit 'Trina in the side of the head. It collapsed like an over-ripe pumpkin and she went down, oozing mucky grey stuff.
Ed felt hands grabbing at the back of his shirt and swung the frying pan over his left shoulder. Shelli fell to the ground and her body immediately turned into ickey goo.
Ed stood back and sized up the other two who seemed a little undecided for a second. Then, still mumbling something about 'brains', they started toward him. The frying pan hit one and then the other and both collapsed to the ground like zombie rag dolls.
He dropped the frying pan and tried to catch his breath. In only a minute, the bodies turned to liquid and seeped into the ground leaving behind checkered shirts and other traces of clothing. He decided he would hose down the front lawn later. Then he heard his Grandmother calling him from the back of the house.
"Oh, Ed dear! That pretty friend of yours, Tina, is at the back door but she doesn't look very well at all. Let's just have her in for a nice cup of tea and some tomato soup."
Ed sighed and picked up the frying pan wondering how he would explain this later to his dear Grandmother.
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If you don't remember Ed's adventure with the mutant tomatoes, you can read it here.
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