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IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR AND I STILL CAN'T GET MY ENTIRE BEING BACK...I FEEL AS THOUGH I'M STILL A BIT NUMB EVERY NOW AND THEN...MAYBE EVEN EMPTY...FAILED RELATIONSHIPS HAVE A WAY OF DOING THAT, ESPECIALLY THE ONES YOU REALLY WANTED TO WORK BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO PROVE TO PEOPLE THAT IT WAS WORTH IT...WHERE TO BEGIN WITH THIS? OR BETTER YET, WHERE DOES IT END? I'VE HEARD OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE BUT DAMN. I DON'T EVEN LOVE THE MAN ANYMORE. HE ISN'T A PART OF MY WORLD AND HE WILL NEVER AGAIN BE...THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO IN THIS LIFETIME...I WANT TO JOIN THE US AIRFORCE...BEEN A DREAM OF MINE SINCE I GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL BUT SOMEHOW, I FEEL THAT'S ALL IT'S GONNA BE...JUST ANOTHER DREAM. I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO GET STARTED HERE...I'VE HAD A WALL UP FOR A WHILE NOW AND DECODING WHAT I FEEL IS A LITTLE HARD TO COMPREHEND ESPECIALLY AFTER A FAILED MARRIAGE. TO ME NOW, IT'S A BLESSING...BUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE...I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE...DO I JUMP IN HEAD FIRST INTO THE FAMILIAR REGION OF BEING A COUPLE...OR DO I WING IT...US AIRFORCE?...DAMN EMPTINESS...UGH, DECISIONS DECISIONS...WE'LL SEE WHERE LIFE TAKES ME...NOW TO TRY AND GET TO BED...GOTTA WAKE UP AND HEAD TO THE FAMILIAR BEAT OF ALWAYS...CIAO FOR NOW... |
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Posted by aziulblue on 2008-03-23 03:07:01 | Rating: | Views: 30
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