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| Love Dare Days 12-14 |
Day 12 Dare: Demonstrate Love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse. Tell them you are putting their preference first. I didn't really do this one. I always give in on every disagreement. I tried to think of something but I couldn't. And if I told my husband that I was giving in because I was putting his preference first....he would not appreciate that. He feels he is right because that's just the way it is, not because its a prefrence...lol. We haven't really been having disagreements much lately anyway.
Day 13 Dare:Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to fight by. Resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.
What rules did you write for yourself? I didn't talk about this with my husband yet, I may, I haven't decided yet. We have talked about this in the past, but we have broken the rules a few times. My rules for me are:
1. Never bring up past mistakes/failures, or say you "always" or "never"
2. Never mention divorce
3. Listen and make sure he is done before I speak
4. Think before I try to speak
5. Do not let my emotions lead my mouth
Those are really hard for me. I do better if I wait and just write down what I'm thinking and give him a note. That way I can think through it all and I'm not interrupting. I never bring up divorce, so that's not really hard, but its still a rule we have made together from the beginning. We went through a time though that he brought it up often and it really hurt.
Day 14 Dare: Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. Do something he would love to do or a project they would really l like to work on. Just be together.
What did you give up? I didn't really have anything to give up, I tried not to let the kids get in the way to much, and I didn't work on other stuff I could have been doing.
What did you do together? I suggested we put together his new Lego star wars ship that I bought him for one of the previous challenges. He never really has time, but it was fun and we got the whole thing put together. He really liked it. I helped as much as I could and we were together!
What new thing did you learn (or relearn) about your spouse? That he is just a big kid who loves toys!
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Posted by asheylady on 2009-06-14 16:54:05 | Rating: | Views: 48
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