"it's already hurting. shows how much i'm dependent on you, doesnt it, dear?"


another teardrop,
another shame,
another day

countless nights without sleep
countless nights itching for touch

another teardrop
another shame
another day
wanting you back.

i couldnt look you in the eye. i wasnt showing emotions, i didnt want you to see the cold me staring back at you. staring back with despise(?). i dont know what that feeling was, but i definitely didnt want you to leave, even though it was for a week, a night or a year... my problem is that i instantely turn bad the moment you leave. i turn sour, with a cigarette (a cig you hate) hanging from my lips. hurting my lungs. i smell rain and worms now and ive been sitting in the same room for hours, in the same air, with the same smoke, inhaling dirt. shit. inhaling tears for hours.

get the fuck back, will you. i cant stand watching myself in the mirror without you around.