My name is Trixi, im 18, and live in DC. Im short at 5'4" and FAT at 125. I want to get back down to pre-rehab weight. I was 85, I was happy. Ive been off ice for 2 years. Clean from coke for 2 months. speed, 2 weeks. alcohol, this morning. Its a pattern, im sure. Im failing out of college, my boyfriend doesnt even know the real me. Ive managed to elude everyone from my destructive path, no one will know. Today I have to go back to the bar, and im not exactly thrilled to be back at work. But being the thinnest girl there, my tips are pretty good. I havnt eaten in two days, and im in desperate need of another nap. I sleep all day. all night. I wake up to get water. sleep. wake up to pee. sleep. wake up to do a load of laundry. sleep. wake up when Jay gets home, fuck. sleep. wake up to shower. sleep. and when I go back to work, I will have to down the booze, pop the speed. I cant sleep. I cant sleep. And now, I must sleep.