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a four year old beat me up

Right, so I remembered the other thing I wanted to mention about the Bath trip. It actually happened when I was back in London, on the tube home from Victoria station. (I have since learned that the 82 bus that stops outside Holly Park goes all the way to Victoria Station, and only costs 90p, as opposed to the tube, which costs me like £5 and I have to change twice) I was kind of zoning out because I was mildly exhausted, and kind of realised with a shock that I was about to miss my stop. I had a heap of shit with me, too, had stopped at Sainsbury’s on the way home, plus my backpack and stuff, and wasn’t really organised with it, because hey, I never am. So when I realised I was about to miss my stop, I sort of jerked alert, tried to bundle all of my stuff off, including myself, and sort of just fell out of the train onto the platform (mind the gap). The doors are closing, and some incredibly nice and thoughtful and full of good karma guy on the train yells out to me “ You dropped your oyster card!” And I was in a slight panic, because it’s not so easy to get out of a station without an oyster card, but the guy threw it out of the train for me, getting his arm stuck in the rapidly closing doors for his trouble. I was so grateful. (I think I had just recharged the thing, too, would have lost myself £15) He was kind of cute, too, but obviously the moment to exchange phone numbers had passed.

I can’t seem to open hotmail...this is unfortunate…

I had the most rottenly awful night last night. Abbie was treating me like absolute shit, she had been all day, which Laura pointed out was most likely because it was Monday, and she had spent all weekend with her mother, and thus saw me as being less than favourable as a result. So she was a total bitch to me in the morning, told me I wasn’t allowed to come with her when she got dropped off at school, then in the afternoon when she came home, wouldn’t talk to me, except when she wanted something or to tell me that I wasn’t allowed to have whatever she was having. I obviously said something to her about her attitude, so she sulked, then shouted at me, then sulked some more. It came to a head at dinner, when I asked her to finish her dinner, and she responded by scratching me. I told her off, said she wouldn’t have dessert for behaving like this, and if she did so again, she would hear about it from her mother. She scratched again, I got mad, Laura got involved, Abbie got shittier and shittier when she realised there really was no dessert and that she was being carted off to bed, and in the end I had an abusive violent four year old crying on her bed and telling me she hated me.

I know it’s stupid, but it really hurt. It’s not easy when a kid who has been for the most part lovely to you suddenly turns and screams the house down because you’ve told her to finish her dinner. She can be so vile when she’s tired, or when she gets angry, and because of the way Laura has told me to deal with her, I can’t shout or anything like that. My job is to try to joke her out of it, and not be oppositional, because she has enough to that to deal with with her brother. It can be rather trying though, to maintain patience in the situation.

Anyway, I had a cry about it after I’d had some wine, proceeded to get myself worked up about other stuff, and then fell asleep. I know it’s stupid to be cut up about it, but I was just so emotionally drained and a little homesick, and I knew the second that she scratched me that I was going to cry about it later on. I know, I’m lame. I’m feeling much better today, she was fine with me this morning, though Laura warns me she’ll probably be a pain in the arse tonight.

Anyway, I might go and enjoy the last of the peace because they come home.

Posted by amysodyssey on 2008-02-26 10:53:31 | Rating: