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| needing to finally write again!
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Soo ... I was feeling pretty great for a while ... now, I dread getting out of bed in the morning ... I usually don't get up till the afternoon - sometimes not at all. I take acetaminophen alot ... I don't need it but I take them and they made me tired so I drift in and out of sleep. It feels like I'm going backwards-- Dr.T reduced my meds a week or two ago .... but I'm pretty sure that's not what's making me feel like dying again... I'm just sick of life - tired of being a nobody in the middle of nowhere ..tired of waking up to face the day, tired of just breathing ... I seen my neices and nephew that I never seen in a really long time today ... but I didn't actually want to be around them.. I thought I was soo happy they were coming to spend the day at mom's, but when they got here I was like 'When are they going back?' and I thought I was happy Miranda was coming up today, then -again- I was thinking 'Go home!!!' Now that summer's here I have nothing to do and the fucking weather is like shit! .. It's only been sunny for like one day since I got outta school! It's not a matter of not feeling wanted , because I know I am -- I just don't care anymore about anyone else ... I feel like me dying is to please myself ... i dunno ... whatev |
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Posted by alternativechick on 2008-07-03 17:59:12 | Rating: | Views: 31
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I feel your pain. Like there is absolutely nothing out there. Don't necessarily feel down, but just don't care to feel up or be around people who are up. It's nice to know you are getting up in the morning though. Even though my advice is trivial, I can't help but think it's time for you to do something for you. Nothing fancy. Just something small. Like tomorrow you are going to go for a walk and find one flower (funnier if it comes from someone's garden) then tell me all about it in the blog tomorrow. I'll be waiting.
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Posted by Kanaf
on 2008-07-03 19:06:43
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