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| my lifes story and lessons |
im 17 years old and i just returned from child protective services july of 07 which is where i was since i was around 8 or 9 i was bumped from one home to another cut off from my mom and my family. i was hurt in many ways but also i learned from those situations not to feel sorry for myself. i did some stupid stuff those years and some horriable stuff that i cant even think about! i had several case workers and met several different types of people..ive been in situations some people cant imagine. ive been on more than 30 types of medication and in many doses not fit for an adult let alone a child because thats what i was a child but i wasnt treated as one though i was nothing hell i "BELONGED" to the state. a state that is so dependent on other states to take care of it and other states do because of its good millatary and its just like a bully!
i also had to grow up fast so by the time i was 15 i didnt act as a 15 y/o would. i used to think i was a bad ass and could get anything i wanted if i threw a big enough fit but i learned and i learned fast that this was not the way to act if i wanted to survive in a world that is so controled what defines normal! my life has been hard its been extremly rough yet i am here to tell my story i lived through my depression and rose above my helplessness. yet i still have my troubles i have yet to find a way to express my feeling and i hold them in until i explode. but i am working on my issues so i can live on. when i came back to my biological family i found a spoiled and ungrateful 14 year old who is my little brother who treats my mother like dirt but i can not change that. also my older sister(21) with her son(2) laying on my mothers couch also disrespecting my mom.i can not change that either. and a little sister adorable she is 2 and shes getting spoiled as well. lol but i will not let her turn out like me my brother or sister.
i see people who feel sorry for them selves because they have a rough life and they want to give up and i tell them the past is done the present is hard but the future is unknown! you can make your life to be what you want it to be! you just have to have the will to do it.
right now im 17 im back with my family and im happy i really am but im also hesitent because of my happyness which i think is normal b/c i want to avoid any pain but i will not let that fear stop me! because i deserve true happyness! and you do as well.
when you read this i hope it has an impact on how you percive life.....
~H~
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