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So, this may sound super weird...but Zach and I have become such good friends over the past months. And the major thing we both have in common is Jesus...and the fact that we are both strong Christians...Christians who believe in a relationship with Jesus...not some lists of rules that we follow. It's crazy to me though because Zacha nd I love the same band...both were at their recent concert...we didn't go together...but it was this hugely exciting event for both of us. And I absolutely love talking to Zach because he always has some way of encouraging me on. He is a precious friend of mine. And yet I still am attracted to him and I really don't want to be. It's not that I don't want to be it's just that I can't. You see maybe I didn't make this clear in any of my prior posts...Zach is not only a co-worker he is kind of my supervisor. And so while dating a co-worker may be allowed (i'm not sure) dating a supervisor is most definately not. And so I feel like I'm having feelings for a man that I can't. And yet part of me sees that he is the kind of man that I could be very happy dating. AHHHHHHH! I just don't know. It's insane. I just keep focusing on the friendship and I'm very thankful for that...but I just wish there was something I could do to get the attraction to stop. It doesn't make it ackward or anything to work with him...but it just frustrates me.
I was talking to my mom about it the other day, btw my mom and I aren't close at all, and she told me I should just quite my job so I could date him! That was the dumbest idea I've ever heard!!!! My mom doesn't think before she speaks. I love my job and I love the friendship I have with Zach, and honestly I wouldn't trade any of it for anything....but....I just wish I could stop thinking about him in any sort of romantic way!
Life can just be frustrating!