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Where to begin with such a character? Let's start with what you know: his name. Surely as the syllables slide off your tongue they conjuer images of some greek god battling with such power that he threatens to tear our reality apart, or perhaps a philosopher pondering the nature of all existance determined to reach that greater understanding. Or maybe we could be realistic about this and say that you see a man with the name Justin Smith. No matter! Your mental image should be tempered in the forge of truth! Behold the truthishness of the coming text! Justin's hair is actual 22K gold. Justin has walked on water. He has protested 'bling-bling' being added to the Oxford English Dictionary. He uses his teeth as the jaws of life to get helpless people out of car accidents. He has lead a horse water and made it drink. He has found the meaning of life. While on vacation he found the Holy Grail. Justin did not need to be told that 'with great power comes great responsiblity.' Justin does not wear pink, it's lightish red. He brought the mountain to Mohammed. Justin Smith got the Raven to quothe, "Okay, maybe that could happen." During the Christmas season he is the one who checks Santa's list twice. Justin knows where the 'R' that you hear in the word 'Colonel' is hiding. Justin turned down Helen of Troy for prom. MC Hammer was forced to tell the world that Justin 'could touch this.' He knows the best thing in the world is to crush his enemies, drive them before him and hear the lamentations of their women. Joseph Campbell's Path of the Hero was about Justin's life. His hands can turn coal into diamonds. Justin Smith stared into the Abyss and the Abyss stared back, and in the ensuing staring contest Justin won. Justin killed the deputy, but he did not shoot the sheriff. He has express mailed the Ring to Mt. Doom to save everyone a huge waste of time. Justin settled the war in Heaven. His body produces vaccines for any disease he comes into contact with. Justin can end his sentences with prepositions. More important than all of that though is that he got the wonderful opportunety to participate in a Shakespeare play. He wants to thanks mum, pop, and all the light bringers he has come across (minus the first of course). His words, "As every action should be weighed by the affect it has on those present, I have found no more noble people than these here. They are a dedicated lot, and I am sorry I cannot continue with them as they help improve the world, one production at a time."
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Posted by Zophiel on 2008-03-27 06:31:49 | Rating: | Views: 35
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