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This is the diary of Lilly. ..whom I’ve made up in my mind.
I got a letter from Anna yesterday. Being best friends since childhood I’m in awe at our ability to keep in touch over the years. I’m still waiting on her call. I would call her but I feel it is best after reading her letter that I allow her to call me when she feels the time is right.
Her letter read:
Dear Lilly,
Jacob just came in from work and told me he wanted a divorce. I wasn’t surprised that he wanted the divorce, just surprised he had the nerve to tell me. He is a Bastard with no heart if you ask me! A pig I tell you! I was going to call, but he has the landline tied up with incoming and outgoing faxes. I must say after he told me, I reacted like a complete bitch, although, I was able to show my awesome ability to throw an iron, toaster, and a fresh load of laundry out the window! It felt magnificent! Only because the window was open that I continued to throw odds and ends out as well. I’ve been meaning to take that shit to the women’s mission house anyway.
I picked up the remote and that’s when the son-of-a-Bitch decided he would stop me. Of course after he struggled to grab it out of my hand as I held it high in the air, it fumbled to the floor. I then bashed it with my bare foot. Grinding it with my heel as the grey plastic shattered underneath my heel.
I told him I knew he must have a girlfriend or some nasty girl he is kissing on down at the Eagles, the bar he goes to nightly. That would be the only possible reason for him wanting to leave me, and a foolish reason if you ask me!
Speaking of the Son-of-a-Bitch, Nelda, the Mother-n-law from hell showed up minutes after we began our feud. She started butting in telling me things like, Jacob should have left me years ago and she was over-joyed! Can you believe the nerve of that woman?
Right as I balled up my fist to show her, I too, could have a feeling of being overjoyed, Jacob pushed her out the front door telling her to leave. That noisy woman laughed all the way to her car.
Lilly I wish you could have seen me go mad, you would have found humor in it.
I know only you would have gotten a kick out of it, the way I did.
Did I mention he said he had fallen out of love with me about five years ago!? I said to him, “see there, that just shows what a fool you are staying married to woman you don’t love - for a whole five years you have lived a lie! Damnit Jacob, I could have been living it up in Costa Rica drinking my ass off and getting laid by some twenty two year old hottie with stamina!”
That’s when he left the room and went into his office and began faxing only god knows what.
I’m on Fire Lilly!
The nerve of him!
I am sorry to write this, but you know we hold no secrets. I’ll call you in a few days when this all sinks in.
I miss you and Cricket and of course wish David was still here on earth. You had a wonderful husband Lilly!
I’m planning a visit before I move to Costa Rica!
Love you friend,
Anna
I guess I'd better clean this house or she would just die if she seen the way Cricket and I have been living.
Night for now
Lilly
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