View Blog    What I want to tell him I want to tell him that i dont wat to have sex anymore. He told me that he wanted a  Godly relationship and that he wanted to get saved again... For real. Together. Thats what I want to but I want to tell him the only thing holding us back from that right now is us having sex. I know he'll understand and that he wont get mad or anything... But its not just him... I dont know if  I want to give it up just yet. Soon. Just not yet. I also want to tell him that everytime he says he'll be there for me he's not. When Im reallly depressed  and he's around and i KNOW he wants to be there but he cant be there. Its complicated. His ex doesnt like us hanging out. Im not going to go into detail why. When he hangs around me she gets depressed. When shes there he cant talk to me... At all. When Im depressed and he tries to be there for me she gets sad and he has to leave to talk to her about it. Its all so difficult and the only thing I want from him is just for him to be there. Im tired of feeling alone in a relationship and im tired of feeling hurt. He wants me to tell him how I feel about things but how can I when he cant be there? I cant do a thing when he can hardly get near me on wednesdays and sundays. Any other day we hang out its just when were at church when his ex is there that we cant talk. Im tired of that. Im tired of him not being able to talk to me when he wants to. Im tired of feeling alone when were supoposed to be in it together. Im tired of  knowing he loves me but hes not able to show it yet. But when I feel that way I just think... I know he's mine. I know Im his. I know I can be patient.     Posted by Wanderer on 2008-10-15 15:31:23 | Rating: | Views: 248     Email This to a Friend Friend's Email *    Friend's Name*    Your Name*    Security code*    Refresh Image                 Print This Blog Post     Bookmark: Delicious  Digg  Reddit  Facebook  StumbleUpon    Permalink:      Blog Comments    i know this is going to be blunt but the only reason he's with you IS sex. You're being used. once you pull the sex out of the relationship(if you do)it will fizzle.Your best choice would be to break it off and save yourself for someone special.You said it yourself.He's not there when you need him;but he's probably right there for sex. That should tell you right there.Time to get out of this. Sorry.Just true.i bet deep down you know this. Start fresh. Respect yourself.Expect to BE respected.Set your standards high. You usually get what you ask for.It may take longer and you may be alone for awhile but it's better than what you're involved in now. What you have is not love. If you ask for nothing in a relationship you get nothing. Again,set your standards high and someone will meet them.Write a list of all the good qualities you would like in a person.Write Husband above the list. Then save for yourself for that person.only trying to help!! Posted by  boxerpaws  on 2008-10-15 15:45:53     No, You Can't Be Patient....Life is cruel and if he truly loves you he can't have his cake and eat it with his ex....What kinda of garbage is that? Then you stated he wants to be a Christian...Well, there is an old saying you can't have two masters....and if he truly loves you you should be his first choice...and his ex is his ex he needs to remember what an ex is? and that's excess bagage that is why they broke off...I would cut him-off zero room for excuses...well that's me...You can only serve one master so either you love me completely or walk away... Posted by  JLOyola  on 2008-10-15 15:46:47     This is an abusive relationship run don't walk to the nearest exit.Change religions, change your sex, "Stand not upon the order of your going but go at once" Posted by  penumbra88  on 2008-10-15 15:49:39     boxerpaws: Youre right about a lot of stuff but... I have a feeling he doesnt just want sex. Im going to tell him tonight that im through with sex... if things start to fizzle i'll tell you and i'll admit to being wrong. Posted by  Wanderer  on 2008-10-15 15:59:47     An ex can be a great friend, and even a great adviser, but nothing more. S/he should not be the one who calls the shots. S/he should not be more important than one's lover. S/he should not have hands upon the puppet strings of one's heart. I agree with the others. You're being used. It's time to give him an ultimatum, and to stick by your guns. Unfortunately, it sounds to me like you're using him as much as he is using you. You want to stop having sex, but not just yet. Get real with yourself before you get real with him. Posted by  MyGallimaufry  on 2008-10-15 16:09:01     MyGallimaufry I guess in a way youre right too. It doesnt feel like im using him... I do need to figuire out everything. like i said im telling him tonight no more sex. Thats Not the type of relationship I want and relationships are better and less complicated without sex. Posted by  Wanderer  on 2008-10-15 16:14:43     love and lust are 2 different things. I'm certain that when you put your foot down and sex is out of the picture that it fizzles.I'll give it 2 weeks to a month at best.You'll start arguing more, getting along less and then it will die. Am POSITIVE.When that happens it's your chance to start over, be pure and find that someone special. Posted by  boxerpaws  on 2008-10-15 19:18:44     My first question, whats with the ex? she needs to go asap. I would go with your gut on this. Talk to him asap, you can't keep that inside. Or at least stop having sex. Good luck, hope everything works out in your favor. Posted by  YoursTruly  on 2008-10-16 00:55:48     "relationships are better and less complicated without sex" This is only true when you both agree within yourself this is what you want i.e. you have to agree with you that is how you want a relationship AND he must agree in himself that what he wants. If he agrees no sex because that what you want then the relationship will NOT work, let his ex have him. She has no right to be jealous of you and he should not be running off to console her. Posted by  Long  on 2008-10-16 04:06:42     He IS using you Posted by  southernsun  on 2008-10-16 07:56:59     he dosnt want anything more than sex. if he did he'd be there for you and not keep wandering off with his ex. thats really weird btw. why is she still around? he wants to be godly? thats bullshit. tell him like it is... dont hold back Posted by  livexlaugxhlove  on 2008-10-16 22:01:14  Would you like to comment?     (Maximum characters: 5000)     You have characters left.      Security code:                                                     Refresh Image

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