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God, I guess this proves I need the risperdal.
First an update on my progess. After my last appt w/the doc he wanted me to switch to once a day, double the dosage, instead of 2x/day. For the 1st 5 or so days I had very rough mornings and decided to switch back to the 2x/day regimen, which returned me to how I'd been.
I've still continued to have some manic or combination states every 5 or 6 days. I'm actually do for another one Saturday or Sunday. All in all though I've been happy and mostly normal (other people's normal, my normal is only borderline sane)
I've been doing so good that when I ran out on Monday I decided I would go a few days without it since I had another doc's appt Thursday night. As normal as I've been feeling it's hard to credit the risperdal completely and I fully expected to be OK, maybe some minor issues but nothing I couldn't handle after what I've dealt with before.
At the doc's last night I could feel a depressive state starting, starting early as far as I can measure. The doc had a shit fit and told me never, ever go cold turkey with psychotropic drugs. He also doubled my dosage and agreed I should stay on the 2x/day schedule. I tried to get the script filled last night but the pharmacy said they were out and wouldn't be able to fill it before Tuesday next week.
My depressive state deepened last night and continues to worsen this morning (it's gonna be a real bad one, I can feel it). I can't tell yet if it's a combo state but since I'm typing this I suspect it is. I'm battling a zombie state this morning, trying to keep from curling up in a corner, banging my head on the wall and sobbing for no known reason. This is especially hard to cope with most likely because of the contrast to how I've been and the truly wonderful days I've had recently.
This is gonna be a tough day, I've at least one very trying and emotional thing I've decided to do and that alone could be the trigger for where I'm at. It's really hard for me to tell if this condition is due to my decision or if the decision is brought about by this condition but I'm gonna do it if opportunity allows.
My wife's gonna try some other pharmacies today. Hopefully I'll have the refill tonight and I'll improve before my grandson's birthday party tomorrow. In the meantime I can only hope the bike ride to work helps me this morning and that I can keep from doing anything desperate because I can feel the need, the drive to get it over with and it's eating away at me again.
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Posted by Tony51203 on 2008-05-30 06:08:07 | Rating: | Views: 70
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there should be a place that would be able to help someone get their meds
becuase as you said, you must have it...there you go, why dont you try to figure out how to set something like this up, its a needed service and Im sure you are not the only one who has ever been in this situation. Why dont your doctors recognize this as a problem and do something to fix it!
Doc do get pretty upset when you do not do exactly like they say, afterall, they are the docs...so if they say, take this at this time and this much, if you trust your guy, then do it...another problem some bp's have, is being able to trust the doc!
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Posted by roe
on 2008-06-02 03:25:19
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Don't I know. I always feel I know my issues better then anyone else so I always weigh the doc's position (and anyone else to whom I speak about it) against what I think I know.
My real problems was thinking I could go a few days w/o it, I'd be alright. Never thought it could be worse then ever so quickly.
The doc had a fit and said if I'd called they would have given me a refill and to never, ever do that again.
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Posted by Tony51203
on 2008-06-02 20:23:44
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