Yea moving -- in so many senses of the word.

So, I'm back down at school and I'm in the process of moving from my 3 bedroom apartment to a 2 bedroom townhouse.  I'm really excited because everyone will be living in the townhouse development so it should be a lot of fun, but for the record MOVING IS A PAIN IN THE ASS!

Everything has to go in a box. EVERYTHING.  And everything has to be cleaned. EVERYTHING.  Things that I didn't even know COULD be cleaned have to be cleaned.  For example, the bottom of the fridge ... disgusting.  The tops of the fan, the WALLS.  I know, I sound like some spoiled girl who has never cleaned before, that's not true.  I've cleaned plenty of times, just not in this manner.  Basically I'm erasing my presence at this apartment which brings me to my next thought on moving.

All day I was thinking about how I'm packing up my sophomore year.  All the memories and all that have been packed in to little boxe.  It's refreshing and settling.  But also a little depressing.  Like is just moving too fast and I feel like I'm not living it enough.  Like when you read a page in a book but realize your minds been drifting so you go back and read it again... only I can't go back and live life again so I'll just try to be more present as I move forward.

And my last thought.  As I was going thru all this moving on and packing I got a phone call from my dad telling me that my aunt died.  It wasn't unexpected, she had been sick for a while.  I just sat down in my room and cried for 10 minutes and then I was ok.  Which is scary.  I don't like how quickly we mourn people any more and how quickly people are forgotten. Ifeel like I don't know how to properly appreciate her life because she's not having a funeral, just a memorial service that I can't attend because I'm at school.  So what do I do?  Is just sitting and thinking about her enough?

I don't know.  Life should come with a manual.