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Mike. My baby. Mike. My heart. Mike. My everything.
I know I sound like some little high school girl that thinks shes in love. But if you knew me at all, you'd know that I dont let myself get close to anyone. I had a relationship for 4 years and I can honastly say that I wasnt attached to him. I knew deep down that we werent going to last forever so I didnt let myself fall in love with him. And because of that, he left me. Then last year I met Mike L. We had a lot more in common than me and my previous bf did. But when we first met, I was going through detox. Mike smoked pot and he drank. A lot. And I told him that if we were going to work out that he could not bring that shit around me and then he told me that he loved me so much and that I meant everything to him that he'd stop too. This meant so much to me. That he'd change his lifestyle for me. He also promised that he'd take me away from my dads fury. He said as soon as he finished school he'd take me away and keep me safe. Then after being engaged for 6 months, he suddenly breaks up with me, totally out of the blue. 2 days before his b-day. I was shattered. I had built my future around him. Then 2 days later, hes dating my best friend. Go figure right. And his friend Dan who was also a good friend of mine told Mike that he was a piece of shit for breaking up with me and dating jenny. So needless to say, Mike and Dan stopped being friends. Then Dan told me that the whole time Mike and I were together that Mike never stopped smoking or drinking, he just did it behind my back. Learning that killed me inside. I swore I'd never let another guy use me like that.
I never let my pain show. But my friends knew it absolutly tore me up inside when Mike left me. And my friend Mike G. was there to comfort me. I broke down to him. I let him see the weakest side of me. The side of me I kept inside for years. Mike G and I had been friends for several years and he could not believe that someone like me could love someone so much cuz I'd always been the "I dont need anybody" type. Mike G. had been engaged for 4 yrs to Jessica. She treated him like shit. Mike G. has been through SO much in his life and to have a fiance that treats him like shit? I just didnt understand. He always treated her like a fucking princess and walked on eggshells 24/7 around her. They'd break up like once a week then she'd call him and be like "baby I need you" and they'd get back together. I was there for him when he decided he'd had enough. He said he just couldnt take it any more and I said that he deserved better. Then he said that no one in his life had ever cared about him like I do. Sad, but its true. His family doesnt care bout him, his friends use him for his car n other stuff. And then 2 days after I broke up with Mike L and like a week after he broke it off with Jessica, he asked me out. Now, everyone knows how weird it is when you first start dating ur best friend. Not only was he my best friend and my secret crush for years, he was my other best friend/ ex gfs ex bf....dont know if that makes sense. It was always Mike, Tommy, Kayla and I. I dated Kayla. Then Kayla dated Mike and now Im dating Mike. So she was pissed at me. Jessica was pissed at me. Tommy had liked me since I started dating Mike L. Oh and Tommy's ex gf is my friend that started dating Mike L after we broke up. Go Figure right. High school.
Anywho. Mike. For months I didnt let myself fall in love with him. I just always thought that he was going to leave me for Jessica. One day we were arguing and I threw jessicas name in the fight and he grabbed me by the shoulders and stared me in the face and said "I love you. I love you now more than I ever loved her. You were my best friend before you were my girl friend. You have no idea how much I care about you. I stopped loving Jessica years ago but I thought I was lucky to have her cuz I thought I didnt deserve better. But you taught me that Im worth something. You are the one person in my life that I look forward to seeing every day. You are the reason I wake up in the morning. You are the reason I put up with life. With out you, I would have given up. I love you. I never want to be with out you. I respect you. I want nothing else but to be with you. So stop wasting hurt feelings on Jessica because she means nothing to me and you mean absolutly everything." And then...I cried. oh yeah. I never cry. But I cried so hard that day. I realized right then, that we were meant to be together. That everything bad that had happend in our pasts had lead us right into each others arms. It feels so good to be able to look into someones eyes and say I love you...and mean it with every ounce of my heart.
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Is this the same guy who wants you to kill your dad from one of your recent post? God Im glad Im not in high school anymore.
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Posted by MissShnn6
on 2007-07-18 21:57:14
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| Views: 105
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