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Application Edit June 08

Self forgiveness. Self honesty. I now know what that means. Release and birth into life. The mind knows only what you have given it to know. I forgive myself for allowing myself to think that I am above self forgiveness and self honesty.

I am a body with a mind that thinks. I am capable of much. I am capable of anything. Why am I capable? Why don't I put limits on myself? I forgive myself for being superior. I forgive myself for wanting to be more in this world. I forgive myself for thinking that more in this world is more.

I am here.

This here is surely me. I forgive myself for allowing myself to think I am my mind. I forgive myself for allowing myself to be my mind.

Is it?

Which is which? Me, I.

"I" don't know if I know a me outside of me. I'm not sure if I have ever seen me.

What am I.. Routine: Eat, buy, play music, type computer, write, draw, sing, wash, clothe, clean, pat the cat, tend plants, consider other's troubles, sex machine, creator, living; this could go for quite a while. I forgive myself for allowing myself to be daily routine.

Outside of routine, what am I. A head always thinking about what the body is going to do next.

When I stop. When do I stop? When is it stopping? How am I meant to know. I haven't had any profoundly living spiritual experiences; any miraculous happenings to gauge the life I live by.

Who am I meant to follow? Who are you following? Why are you following someone? How exactly will this help you? I forgive myself for allowing myself to search for something other than myself as all to be all that I can be. I forgive myself to think I am less or more than another being. I forgive myself for allowing myself to be frustrated with myself. I forgive myself for allowing myself to be frustrated with my application of self forgiveness.

Page by page I turn the transcripts in my mind. Why do I store things? What purpose has storing things got to do with real living? I forgive myself for allowing myself to have remorse. I forgive myself for allowing myself to search for myself.

Real living? Define me. I can't I don't know what's there. I don't assume anything at all to be there.

I forgive myself for not knowing who I am.
I forgive myself for denying all of what I could never see .
I forgive myself for allowing myself to deny all of what I can't see with my mind consciousnesses' eyes.
I forgive myself for feeling proud of myself.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to be 'more' than mySELF!

I forgive myself for not respecting myself as all, here in and as oneness and equality.

I am here, in and as oneness and equality.

I forgive myself for expecting more from myself.
I forgive myself for expecting anything from myself.
i forgive myself for ever expecting.
i forgive myself for thinking that I love.
I forgive myself for losing myself in a direction where I would search for what I think is love.
I forgive myself for not taking myself seriously.
I forgive myself for misleading myself constantly.
l forgive myself for reacting to my own self forgiveness.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to be all that has manifested on this planet.
I forgive myself for allowing myself to think I am 'special' in any way whatsoever.
I am here.
in and as oneness and equality.

Posted by SpacingVading on 2008-04-23 06:47:51 | Rating: