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| ONE YEAR |
Happy 4th of July. A funny thing happens to me on holidays. I have a tendency to pause and reflect on how different this year is from last year.
Last year Joey and I had been broken up a couple of months. By Mid-July he was back with his ex-wife buying a house. I was hurt. But I was slowly starting to accept my life as it had been dealt to me. I was slowly becoming resigned to my fate.
I sat alone in the local telemarketing parking lot and watched the 4th of July fireworks. I cried a little. I prayed. I didn’t pray for God to send me someone. I prayed for him to give me the strength to live the life that He had chosen for me. I drove back home to my tiny hovel of a house in the Ghetto, and fell asleep surrounded by the blaring ghetto sirens- the soundtrack to my life.
One year. In the space of just one year- life is so different for me now. I live in a nice quiet neighborhood. My new soundtrack consists of running water from the lakes, and singing birds.
My future is so uncertain. Before I remember thinking that there really wasn’t much point getting up and living each day…considering it was a carbon copy of the day before it. Now my job is in jeopardy. Everyday there are new rumors. Everyone around me is terrified. I am too- but I also find that I am very distracted.
I’ve been seeing Randy for 23 days. Tonight I get to go and watch fireworks. Randy and his daughter are taking me to go see the fireworks. This is huge. He took me fishing, he SLEPT at my house. And tonight he is taking me to see fireworks.
He came to see me last night. He is the only man I have ever been with in my life that after sex we find ourselves laughing and cutting up. I like him a lot. He scares the daylights out of me but I like him a lot.
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Posted by SimpleSugar on 2009-07-04 08:00:33 | Rating: | Views: 17
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