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ok so you havent check this in a minute i see, so i decided to come on here to vent. doesnt matter if it gets read or not as long as i write it before i go crazy ! ok so i belive me and my daughter are the only ones happy about this pregancy and i took your advice about talking to "him"about our issues and nope didnt seem to work. i think i am the ONLY one excited and happy about this pregancy! even though we BOTH planned it! and his excuse is all his friends lost their babies so that is his reason for not telling anyone yet even though i have told my whole family and friends! glad to see he is thinking nothing but negative thoughts i see. so i will contunue to pray every nite and think positively! becuase no matter what anyone says i am happy that i am pregnant and will continue to be and for my health sake i will try not to stress becuase that is not good! well now i am crying but thats cause i am writing this but i promise myself that this will be my last tear i shed during this pregancy unless it is good news! i just pray that everything changes around here cause i cant take it anymore, just to thought i was doing everything i wanted to do and THOUGHT i would be happ, i never cried so much in my life since i moved here. i have NEVER cried over a man other than my daughters father but the tears that i have shed around here have not been for a man but more like a disappoint to myself! i am soooo upset with myself and what i have let myself become. I will continue to strive for sucess but how can someone acheive that if all they have is dispair, sadness, regrets, and misery. The man i wanted to be with and loved dearly has turned into the man i didnt want. I guess a man treats you a certian way when he wants to have all your control and when they have it they could give a shit afterwards. All i ever wanted was happiness is that too much to ask! i wanted to have what people i know dont have and that is nothing but happiness! thast all i want! to be fucken happy! is that tooo much to ask! how can someone avoid stress? i need to avoid stressful people, enviornments and stressful actions but HOW! HOW do you pretend to be happy! i honeslty dont give a FUCK about others but my daughter by why do i let these mutherfuckers get to me! guess its becuase i am used to having the upper hand in every situation and now i DONT. but again my goal will be to get back on top of things. i am seriously on a new mission. To make good things happen in FUCKED up situations! and i dont give a FUCK who gets hurt in the process , people should of thought about that when my fucken feelings were invloved! ok so there is my venting and me writing all this shit made me realize what i need to do exactly! so thanks to this damn blog LOL
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Posted by RoloKarr on 2007-09-25 18:03:56 | Rating: | Views: 91
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being pregnant is stressful I know. I hope things improve for you in this pregnancy. The last thing you and the baby need is any stress. I am in the same boat. The only one pleased is my 5 year old daughter. My partner doesnt seem interested at all. We had both decided to try for another one a year and a half ago. And when it happens and we argue I get told it was my choice to keep it. Nice huh? Just concentrate on you and the baby and your daughter. I wish you the best I really do.
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Posted by needlesANDink
on 2007-09-26 09:35:21
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